Title. He is more introverted than I am and also tends to need more sleep etc. I am quite extroverted and on the days we aren’t together, I usually spend my free time around people anyway (roommates and friends). I have a bad pattern of when I’m in a relationship, wanting to be with my partner 24/7. It led to some pretty unreasonable and and anxious behavior on my part, in the past. Ditching plans to hang out with my so and then getting upset when they won’t do the same for me, not being able to do anything by myself, feeling depressed/exhausted/anxious anytime we were apart.
I have been working on this and have gotten to the point where I still want to see my bf as much as possible, like 5-7x a week, but I know that this is a pattern that has been harmful for me in the past, and would not be helpful to me in my present situation (I work long hours (9-7), have a dog, and enjoy spending time with my roommates) and would be stressful to my partner (he also works a lot, lives ~25 min away by car, and I don’t have a car).
On average, we see each other 2-3x a week. Usually spending 1 night together during the week and 1 night on the weekend and maybe a 3rd date/hangout/sleepover if we have time… we have been together ~2 months, but I feel upset, guilty and rejected that he rarely ever asks to hang out more than that. He is amazing in every other way, he is so affectionate, loving, intelligent, gentle, brings me little gifts, always communicating and thinking of me.
I don’t really have a good sense for what is normal in relationships since my parents have a dysfunctional relationship and I have only ever been in dysfunctional codependent relationships my whole life.
Is this a normal amount to see each other?? How much time do you spend with your s/o and how has that changed since you first got together?