Hi everyone,
I’ve (31m) been dating a lady (26F) for 4 weeks now.
When we met, the feelings were very intense, passionate and I felt like we had a common connection. She’s even met my family once and everyone loved her.
Recently, this week, I started to feel a certain anxiety about the relationship creep in and I realised there are some underlying depression and anxiety I’m going through about my life in general and my certainty about a romantic relationship – and I have no idea where this is coming from.
I have put myself into therapy (first session today) to address this unknown baggage I have. I’ve told her this and said that I truly value our relationship and connection, but I feel this is not the right time for me.
We’ve agreed to take a step back and decrease our frequency of meeting up and communication. She’s an absolutely amazing person, compassionate, kind, we’re on the same page on certain things. However, something doesn’t sit quite right with me and I can’t put my finger on what that is, I just have an overwhelming feeling of this is not the one for me. I’m trying to be kind to her and feel like a villain for having these thoughts.
I don’t think I’d want to proceed with this and I need more time alone to deal with my own issues before I’m ready to venture out again and I can’t put a timeframe on how long this would take. I’ve taken the call to not be physically intimate as I do not want to disrespect her as she needs to be treated with dignity.
Am I wrong for wanting to end it, and if not, how should I do it the kindest way possible? Please be kind to me as well as I’m very, very vulnerable at the moment. Thank you.