29M. I’ve cried in front of my GF (23F) a couple of times recently. I’ve been going through a lot emotionally, stressed out at work, family stuff, it kind of all piled on. What initiated me crying was there was a moment in front of her friends, her friend criticised me sharply on something kind of dumb. I normally wouldn’t care but it was right in front of my GF, and she really sided with the friend. I later cried in front of her privately telling her that hurt and that I feel like she doesn’t empathise with my emotions and only looks after her own at times.
Now I’m obviously older than her, I feel like she looked down on me when I cried, expecting that I should be a “mature, older man” and somehow this maturity means I don’t cry. And since I did cry, I feel like she inwardly looks down on me and maybe even subconsciously thinks I’m weak, even though she would never directly voice that.
Am I being paranoid? Is the expectation really that men should not cry in front of women? I’m more comfortable showing my emotions that most men, but if it’s looked down on as weak then I don’t know how I feel about that, and honestly it diminishes my trust with a girl if she thinks that.
Edit: I should add that I was raised solely by my mother, no father figure. So I do feel sometimes self-conscious that I can be “softer” than other men because my mother was the only example I had. She taught me that it’s okay and even good to express your emotions to others, but maybe I do it too much.