My wife of 4 years is a stay at home mom (her choice). And she’s picked up a couple hobbies recently, they seem to make her happy so I’m happy.
But this is where the problems began. Money has been tight since she stopped working, and I pick up as much extra hours as I can to make things more comfortable. A month ago I was going through the (shared) bank records because it seemed super low. She had spent over 3k in 3 months on her hobbies. We had an argument, she apologized, and promised not to do it again.
Last week I checked the account again because I had a bill to pay and it seemed lower than it should. She had spent over 800. I was furious but did my best to stay calm about it. She did put some money in the account (<200) but that doesn’t excuse it.
She been hiding and omiting details of just how much she’s spending and the hobby stuff she’s bringing into the house. This is enough to make me lose trust, but a few days ago she lied directly to my face about a $200 charge. I knew exactly what it was for simply by googleing the name on the charge to the bank. She told me it was for stuff for the house and kid that she got on marketplace. Showing me what a good deal she got on “all this stuff” for just 200.
The audio of this conversation was captured by one of the security cameras. I’ve listened to it multiple times because I feel like I’ve been gaslit for months.
I haven’t confronted her on this bold faced lie. I don’t even know where to start, but now I’m suspicious of everything she says and does. I feel like our whole life is a lie.
I’m just lost right now. I never thought she would do something like this. I want to fix things but I don’t know how.