So me and my partner of 10 years recently haven’t been getting on so he moved back with his mum for a while. I was kind of recently diagnosed with something that affects how I feel about my body HUGELY, it’s let me down and doesn’t work how a ‘woman’s body’ should, and having it is usually uncomfortable for me as it’s all changed downstairs. So I just don’t like doing it anymore but I’ve still been doing it at least once a week for him because he ‘loves it’.
So yesterday he came round whilst our son was at school, and I was lying on the sofa (my condition means I’m tired a lot) and he comes and lies like next to me cuddling me, but I know he only comes and does that when he wants s3x. I cuddled him back and he starts trying to touch me and I pushed his hand away twice. He said ‘do you want to go upstairs’ and I said no, I just wasn’t in the mood.
The problem is when I say no I automatically feel uncomfortable, he got up of me straight away, but if I’m going in the kitchen to clean up or even to get a drink he touches me on the outside of my clothes, it makes me feel so uncomfortable, he acts like he’s in a mood with me, then asks AGAIN later like if I’m not in the mood I’m not going to change my mind?
It’s like when he wants to do it he doesn’t care about anything else he even accused me of cheating in him because I didn’t want to once
Is this normal? He says he doesn’t mean to make me feel uncomfortable but he does sooo??…
2 comments
>when he wants to do it he doesn’t care about anything else he even accused me of cheating in him because I didn’t want to once Is this normal?
No, it’s sexual harassment. And an attempt at coercion. Which is a form of sexual abuse.
I’d suggest you tell him that sexual harassment and sexual abuse don’t make you feel sexy and the more he does it, the less you want to have sex ever.
Because that is what he’s doing to you.
His intentions here are clear and irrelevant. He intentions are to get sex and that completely trumps his care for your comfortability.
He is acting like he’s entitled to your body and that’s fucked up. It’s not fair that he’s only showing you affection when he wants something.