OK, so basically I married way way younger than my demographic – I live in a liberal, wealthy city in the North East where most people get married at 30 or older. I’m also not from the US, and my husband isn’t from this area, so we don’t have any built-in friends.
I’m really lonely as I am currently not in a 9-5 job (I dropped out of grad school and am looking to either further my studies or change industries), and really don’t have any face-to-face contact with human beings other than my husband. I teach on Zoom for extra cash so I do have that contact, but I feel like it isn’t the same.
I am not religious (Church is not an option), don’t have pets, and don’t have kids. So I feel like the three most common ways of meeting people are kinda closed off to me. Also, did I mention that I also don’t drink or enjoy live music?
So yeah, basically – I’m a boring person and I have nothing to offer, but I feel like I could be a friend to another boring person like myself, you know? And I know I shouldn’t limit my potential friendship circle to married women but I’m interested in meeting people who share my challenges, my worldview etc. instead of women venting about their hookups etc.
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I’m a gamer and there it is easy to meet other people for me. But the principle is the same for any hobby. If you go to the gym or join a club you’ll certainly meet like minded people. Especially if you don’t have a job joining a club could help you get distraction.
I can tell you marriage children or just one of them making friends is extremely difficult.
For me it’s having the time not just to meet new people but the spare time that will be needed to keep them in our lifes.
Only easy way I would do myself is groups online like groups for people that live in that area.
And then just getting out and enjoying it even if you didn’t get a friend you got out and about and that’s a start
When I was doing crossfit, I made a lot of other married women friends. Despite having moved on to more traditional body building and marathon running, we have maintained our friendships.
There are also women I’ve met and consider friends through work.
Do you have any hobbies you do outside of work that are particularly social? Book clubs, roller derby, sports – that sort of thing?
I live in New York City, so I imagine that it’s similar to where you live, I’m twenty three and I’ve been married for almost two years.
Many of my friends are those I met while attending university, and the only other friends I’ve made outside university are those who are part of my hobby group.
It can be difficult to make friends, but I think hobby groups are generally a good place to look.
There are a lot of social MeetUp groups. I was in the same situation as you and then ended up finding some friends through the events