Ok here’s the context
I had a 1 on 1 “hangout” with my crush. After the “hangout”, I asked her if she wants to hangout again, then she replied with that statement “Sure, just let me know”
Then yeah I told her after july 16, I will message her. Then before we left the table, she kept on thanking me for the hangout and for the time. Then she said she appreciated me as friends
Does that mean she friendzone me when she told me she appreciated me as a friend? Any opinions or advice?
48 comments
She said the phrase “as friends”. Sorry bro. It’s over.
Yes, she only agreed to go o it with you to see what happened and based on that hang out she came to the conclusion that she enjoyed to go out as friends and that’s it.
basically you wasted your chance with her, and if she agrees to go out there will be a clear boundary “the just as friends” boundary.
Yep, that’s done. Happened to me. “You’re my new best friend. I really enjoy spending time with you.”. My response: “Nope, I’m not. I have enough best friends.” kind of playfully. Enjoyed the rest of our evening, took her home and that was that.
Bro that happened to me recently and it freaking sucks
Yeah buddy.
Yea sorry dude, she’s really not that interested in you. Does she initiate conversations or invite you for anything? if not then yea, it’s better to look somewhere else.
I am not seeing what I think you hope I see.
She is a “FRIEND” no more, and most likely much, much less.
BUT! Does she have cute friends? She could become a resource! You picking up what I’m putting down?
Ask another girl out
Bro ask her out. Use the word date. Leave nothing to the imagination
Did you ask her to hang out, or did you actually ask her for a date initially? To me, those are two entirely different things. If she didn’t know it was a date then what she said isn’t that weird, IMO our mentality changes when we go on proper dates, everything is generally more formal at first since you’re trying to feel each other out to see if you’re compatible. If it’s just a hangout everything’s more casual since everything is more…In the moment (if that makes any sense lol).
Assuming she even knew it was meant to be a date in the first place I’d say you’re better off moving on, but if you really want her to say it clearer I suppose you could ask her out, and let her know you want it to be a proper date. I don’t think you have good odds though tbh.
If she does say no, do yourself a favor and take it gracefully. If you can move on from your crush then feel free to hang out with her as friends, she may even be the one to lead you to your next crush lol. If you can’t see her in any way except romantically then it’s best to part ways.
She has agreed to hang out as friends. So she wants to be friends.
Did you make it clear you wanted to be more than friends?
This kid getting nowhere in the comments, looking for confirmation bias
OP, I intend this with the greatest of kindness and respect-i get the feeling you might not be neurotypical. You seem to really be struggling to understand basic social situations and to understand/accept feedback. I’m not feeling any stubbornness or malice. I feel like you genuinely don’t get it and are trying to do the right thing.
I don’t know where you live, but there might be some services that can help you.
I have a child on the spectrum and she attended a bunch of workshops on social situations, how to interpret what people are saying and doing, how to empathise and how to express what you feel clearly. And it was super helpful.
Just food for thought.
Ruunnnn!!!!!!!
If a guy asked me to just hangout I’d think he’s either looking for a hookup or a friend.
You need to actually flirt and see how she responds. Not just pay for her coffee (I saw you comment that somewhere) because friends pay for each other’s things sometimes too.
Then ask her on an actual date. If you keep doing little friendly hangout sessions, it seems like you’re trying to friend-zoning yourself.
Also why did you say you’d message her after July 16?
F
sounds like you’re friends and you’re date-zoning her
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This is not definitive one way or the other. Hit her up in a few days and tell her how you feel and that you want to date. Don’t leave it unsaid – then you’ll wonder forever.
You’re friendzoned, either stay as friends and move on romantically or if you can’t move on then stop being friends.
Yea you are type 2 friendzoned, the type of friend zone where she wants to get with you, but she feels like your missing something.
Gotta step your game up.
Work on yourself and study the art of seduction
piggybacking off everyone else’s comments here: yea, you’ve been friendzoned, bud
Friend zone and she was super nice about it too. Leave it at that
Okay OP, I think there’s a possibility that everyone seems to be missing. Perhaps she’s really into you, and wants to continue to hangout (as more than friends), but is looking for you to make the first move. Maybe she’s wanting you to ask her out? It doesn’t sound like you’re from a western country, so I think maybe we’re all judging this from a different perspective. As an example, I’m from the United States, and most girls make it pretty obvious if they want to be more than friends. Also, I “hangout” around once a week with different friends that are girls, and there’s nothing more implied or expected. Just because she wants to hangout doesn’t necessarily mean she wants anything more.
I would suggest asking her out on a proper date, and see how she responds. Maybe she’s waiting on you to make the first move. If she turns you down, that sucks, but at least you will know exactly where you stand.
Ask her out specifically on a date, if she say no move on. You will never get friendzoned again
The “friendzone” doesn’t exist. If you cannot handle a person only being interested in a platonic friendship with you, I highly suggest seeking out a therapist. Also, it is equally awful to only be nice to someone with the expectation you’ll get something out of it, be it sexually, romantically or just even a simple date. People are allowed and more than justified to only want to be friends with another person.
You have a crush on them, not the other way around. They said they value your friendship. Wanting to hang out is not a hint/clue/suggestion they feel the same way. Trying to dismiss people telling you this with “Well, then why would they want to see me again????” is honestly coming across as creepy and heavily in denial. You may be a terrific spouse for someone, but one-way crushes do not have to give you a chance as anything more than a friend.
If you genuinely like this person and aren’t only interested in what may or may not be contained in their pants, ask them out on a proper date. Don’t say hang out or meet up, etc. Actually go to the lengths of saying “Hey, would you like to go out on a date with me?” You’ll have a much clearer picture then. If you’re not willing to do that, you need to accept that not everyone you develop a crush for will reciprocate it.
Yup. She doesn’t find you attractive, this was polite way of saying it. Just move onto the next. Good luck.
Yes
Bro, you we’re ready to sex zone her and she friend zoned you instead?
Tragic
Learned a lot from this [article ]. So you can try also (https://www.updatesapk.com/2022/05/12/how-to-get-out-of-friend-zone/)
Ask her.
That doesn’t say anything about anything.
“I appreciate you as a friend” could be a hint that she wants to be just friends. But could also be a clumsy way of saying she appreciates you ( hinting to liking you). Fits with her thanking you so many times.
Was the hang out flirty? What happened?
And maybe you just need to ask her. Tell her:” I had fun the other day. I’d like to go out again. How about Friday? Or you say “It’s fine if you just want to be friends. But I kinda like you, you know. How do you feel?”.
Boy, your post history is something else.
Not necessarily! I think a lot of relationships start out as friendships. But to be on the safe side, I’d take her at her word for now and proceed with this like a friendship. Then, if you get the vibe that things are starting to feel like “more than friends” you can go from there!
Don’t be disheartened right now but also don’t rush her as that would probably ruin your romantic chances and the friendship!
Good luck!
How can it be friendzone if you didn’t confess your feelings toward her? How could she know you are into her? She jut thinks you are good friends for now. If you asked her she could have clarified that she is into you and wants to be more than friends or said she just wants to be friends. Don’t overlook her statement as a friendzone. She doesn’t even know you want to be more than friends.
Sounds like you’re friends-zoned, any chance if you leaving it will start with you becoming less available to her.
don’t worry, may she said that because you still don’t know each other well and she didn’t expect you to have a crush on her, if i were in your situation, i would keep getting along with her until i win her trust then i’ll propose her to be my girlfriend
If you have to ask that question the answer is yes.
Your post history is rough buddy. She isn’t interested and you need to work on you before you try to pursue anything with any woman.
The friend zone does not exist
*flips desk*
Here’s the advice:
Better yourself for yourself
Be a better friend
Stop convincing yourself you are her friend when the reality is you’re just hanging out waiting for her to decide if she ever wants to fuck you. Why are you like this… why do you want to be like this…
Regardless You are not entitled to sex or friends or love etc etc etc so stop taking all of these experiences for granted
This will be a reoccurring pattern for you, you should to learn from this
Yoooo this OP is scary just see his history😂😂😂
I’ve been through this myself. I wanted to date her so much, but she just wanted friendship. Ended up taking her camping, sharing a 2 person tent, I ended up fingering her but she wasn’t into me and nothing happened, but after that day she stopped talking to me and I lost a good friend. After I stopped putting so much energy into chasing her and focused on other women, I got a gf very quickly and now we’re married. My advice, look for other women and don’t push this friend away.
She’s your female friend who very specifically told you she appreciates you as her friend.
‘Hanging out’ is not automatic code word for ‘making out’.
She is not friend zoning you, she is your friend. There is a difference: you are trying to see something in the situation that at least based on your post is not present and she has not alluded to.
The fact that she specifies that she appreciates you ‘as a friend’ means she is very specifically trying to tell you that she is not interested romantically, but she likes being your friend, and she likes being in your life, as a friend.
It also means your attempt at advances may have made her uncomfortable, because she is very gently trying to shut it down.
Respect her wishes and enjoy her company as a friend, if you can. If you cannot, it’s ok to tell her that you need to protect yourself emotionally and therefore need to withdraw a bit. It will suck, but heartache can be hard to handle without distance. Just remember that it doesn’t make you a bad person at all, as long as you don’t blame her for not sharing your feelings.
Best of luck to you both OP.
You’re in the friend zone. Most likely she agreed to hang out again to avoid getting into a confrontation. Move on she’s not worth it.
friend zone isnt a real thing.
if the person isnt interested move on.
you are not intitled to someone love and affection because you love them and because you spend time and all with them. if you are doing it to be with them romantically and will stop everything after being rejected or try even harder to get with them, your intentions aren’t right.
seems life they already gave you the answer.
if its clear with them that, thats how things are. move on.
ask this person dirrectly. if the answer remain the same. move on.
You again?
You’re focusing too much on her and she knows this. Ignore her, Start talking to more girls, hit the gym consistently, then hit her back in 6 months