18M here, I made a new group of friends this year thanks to a party I went to around January where I met them. At first they seemed very chill and just wanted to hang out a lot but as I got to know them better I realised they are actually quiet racist and were maybe using me cause I had access to a car. I can take racist jokes but when someone tells you that they actually don’t like your race with a straight face multiple times, I wouldn’t think of it as a joke. We usually hang out in the evening or late at night which means I can use my dad’s car since he comes back from work and none of them drive their cars cause they are not allowed to. They have cancelled plans since I would not be able to come because then they would have no medium of free transport. My social skills are alright but making new friends has always been a hit or miss for me. Has this happened to any of y’all? I’d love to know
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I used to deal with this kinda. Like, i had friends who made racist jokes, but werent really racist. However, behind every joke lies some truth, and as we got older, i learned their parents or grandparents were really racist or prejudice against POC, despite liking me, it still was uncomfortable. Theyre still my bros for life, but i think our paths in life just diverged for the best because of this.
And as for you, i personally wouldnt put up for it. First of all, were in one of the worst time of our lives to be racist. No room for it today. 2nd, lomg term, from personal experience, youre gonna find yourself in uncomfortable social situations, awkward family greetings. I mean, if these friends cant invite you to their wedding, whats the point? Like a one night stand of friendship. Cut that shit.
Bro, these cats are using you.
If they aren’t respecting of other races, and have told you they don’t like your race, then you need to dip out.
Making friends in life is hard. But don’t make friends with people who make life harder. I know you’re afraid of being alone. However, these guys are racists, and will either turn on you or end up in some real trouble at some point that you could be dragged into.
Back away, but don’t confront them. Over time, begin to respond more slowly to their texts and calls while branching out and trying to meet better people. When they contact you, take more and more time before you contact them back and then finally stop responding at all. Spread it out over a month or two. If you confront them it could turn ugly really fast.
Make new friends. This could take a while, even a year maybe longer, but prepare yourself for that and you’ll be fine.
its hard to get a new friend group cause i tried it but for me its even harder to leave the old group, what i did is i spent less and less time with them over time.. if they invite me to something i make up an excuse that i cant go.. lunch time in school is the hardest lmao cause i dont wanna eat lunch alone, but while i was in the friend group i had a special someone and i spent time with them more often.. id prolly find a seatmate or groupmate to be friends with or inv to lunch with every other day while im still in the old friend group..