This may sound a bit strange or silly, but I really need some advice.
So, a few months ago I’ve been diagnosed with Vaginismus, after years of not being able to have intercourse with my partner and being on super-long waiting lists.
I’ve been told to do kegels and was prescribed some dilators, which I haven’t been able to use yet.
However, a few days ago, I felt really decided to try and do the kegels this time with my finger inserted. It was surprisingly easy, considering I’ve never been able to insert even a tampon, and the idea of getting my own finger in has always made me freak out.
Anyway, I’m only doing about 5 minutes/day. For me, managing to get it in is all the victory I need, for now.
I can even try to get it deeper and I’m amazed at how it literally guides my finger in the right direction! So that’s good, I’m really happy.
I’m quite sore afterwards but a couple hours later I feel “like new”, and it makes me actually look forward to do it again the next day.
The problem is my whole arm hurts SO BAD when I try to keep my finger in. And I don’t understand why. Maybe I’m tensing it? Maybe is the angle?
I guess it somewhat distracts me from what I’m doing, but the pain is so bad it’s impossible to ignore.
I’m sure there’s no way it’s normal for my arm to hurt that bad.
I tried to somewhat sit rather than lie down, but that hurt me down there instead of my arm. So I’m not sure what to do, in this regard.
It distracts me a lot from the exercises I have to do and makes me not be able to keep the finger in there for too long (I have to keep taking it out over and over so my arm “rests”, and put it back in, which makes me more sore), even though I would like to leave it in for longer, to get used to having something in there, like the doctor suggested.
I know using the dilators would fix this problem, but I’m still not quite ready to use them yet, and I don’t want to push myself too hard too fast.
But this arm pain is impossible to ignore, so I was wondering, what am I doing wrong? What could I do better?
Thank you, and sorry if the question is silly, all this is new for me and even if the solution is something simple, I really can’t think of anything at this time.
2 comments
Are you putting your arm down the front of your body?
You might try laying on your side or stomach and using your hand from behind.
You could also try finding some appropriately small sized toy, like a thin pen or marker. Wash them first and/or use a condom with them, for vaginal health.
It sounds like you have a partner? Maybe this could be something fun to do with them?
I don’t have experience with this, but I do know that when I finger myself I don’t get ANY pleasure from it. The feeling of inside of myself is very odd and off-putting for me and it distracts me from how good it feels (at least this is my theory, because I enjoy when my bf fingers me, but when I do it I can only think about how the “walls” of my vagina feel).
My hypothesis is maybe your similar, and tense your arm or hold it in a way that is uncomfortable, but you don’t notice as you are trying to focus on your exercise and then your arm gets sore.
All speculation but maybe it helps idk