For people who aren’t fond of small talk

5 comments

1. Complimenting them helps and sometimes leads to a conversation

2. Complement them, talk about things you think about, ask their opinions about current affairs, talk about your day, talk about things that’s happened to you, talk about your partner, pets, kid or friends.

3. Generally, I try to talk about Job/College Major and hometown and then try to work that into a conversation. It takes some practice, but you get better the more you do it.

4. You have to understand what the PURPOSE of small talk is. You can’t just “jump in” to a deep conversation with someone you don’t know. That’s because one of the purposes of small talk is to establish a comfort zone and create some warmth. The OTHER purpose is to find something you’re both interested in talking about. So in that sense I refer to it as a “treasure hunt.”

   Neither of those things is a waste of time.

5. Try to acquiesce to energy. I find that people are becoming much more emotionally intelligent and if I’m in a good mood, it’s usually received well.

   If you lead with any apprehension or uncertainty, people seem to ignore or even worse, mirror your mood. Energy