So a little context. My whole life I’ve been a shy person and never been good with woman. Ive always gotten too nervous and just never really ever spoke to a girl in this way. Me and my now gf met through mutual friends and surprisingly got along really fast. What helped me talk to her was that I was drunk when I met her so I had the confidence liquor gives you. Fast forward 2-3 weeks I kissed her which was my first kiss as well. So then we talked everyday for 2 months almost 3 and I asked her to be my girlfriend and well she said yes but just recently shes started to tell me about the past guys in her life and I was quite shocked by the number. So shortly after we became official we had sex and afterwards she asked me how many girls I’ve been with in my life and I told her she was the only one cause well thats the truth she was my first kiss and my first time so I really feel shes special cause of that. So then I did the mistake of asking the same question and she told me I was the 7th guy she had sex with and that she lost count of the guys shes kissed. When she told me that it hit me hard I don’t know why. I know she had a life before we met but I think that number is quite high for our age. She told me 3 of them were boyfriends including me and the rest were guys she was hooking up with for months. She said her first time was when she was 15 and well mine was when I was 18. So that kind of bothered me cause I don’t like knowing that shes been with that many guys at least to what I think is a lot.
TL;DR:
Is it normal to feel bothered about how many guys my girlfriend has been with? I think 7 guys at 18 is a lot in my opinion but I could be overreacting. Im not too sure why it bothers me but any insight or advice or anything would help me. Thanks.
3 comments
I wouldn’t worry about it. Seven isn’t really that many and your GF will bring a little sexual experience to your relationship. Just be sure you use condoms and/or do regular STF testing–which you should do with any sexual relationship of course.
In general women have earlier sexual experiences than men, if I can give one tip for the future: stop comparing your life and experiences to other peoples.
Women like sex too! And 7’s not that many, either. If it’s bothering you, think about what might be the root cause of that feeling. Do you feel less special in some way because it was your first time but wasn’t her’s? Do you feel like she’s more experienced than you? Do you feel like you need to be “taking the lead” in your sexual relationship but can’t because of your inexperience? No need to answer these questions here – just food for thought. Overall, don’t sweat it. It’s a normal thought to have, but you should look for the “why” behind it.