My divorce is near fruition. It’s truly been an awful 10 months since I moved out. I miss my step kids, I don’t miss her.
I think something is broken in me, I’ve grown angry and cynical. There’s no joy in life living that way. I hide it extremely well until I’m stressed out. I don’t want to be this way, there’s no positive long term to this level of cynicism. As a result I’m pretty depressed.
I look at today’s dating and I’m extremely apathetic. Connecting on a deeper level, I’m not sure such a thing is even real anymore. And that frankly, is a terrifying prospect. To me at least. Dating is very different from even 7 years ago. In person and online. Conversations seem more shallow than before. Feels like COVID made people less personable, is that a thing? Maybe I’m uglier than I thought 🤔
Fellow divorcees, how long did it take you to heal and what was your signal you could return to dating? What helped you return to normal?
1 comment
No concrete time, but part of it gets better, other parts leave scars that, no sugercoating, you wont get rid of. You should seek some mens groups and other help, especially from any friends the same sex to try and work through yourself first. A divorce does cast a shadow on your relationship with the opposite sex and it will be something you will learn to look out for and avoid when interacting… but it doesnt disappear, it is always a bit of a nagging paranoia of trying not to fall into the same trap that made a divorce. Just learn that people are different, your future is different, and if it comes time to do it again you have experience in what is meaninful in a marriage and what you can improve to make a better one the second time around.
My marriage was prettty much done in november 2021, the divorce final in march 2022. I feel better about myself and i hope you find some comfort too buddy.