Me (22/M) and my fiancé (21/F) both likes rough sex. We tried to spice a bit our sex and She said that she likes it but the last time I tried to go a bit forward ( like slapping her or shocking not too hard ) and she got scared, I believe she thought that I would act like that on our daily life or that’s my hidden character.
Now I have difficulties to try it again because I don’t know how I should act exactly even if she says she likes it in general but I don’t want to see that reaction again it makes me feel bad taking in consideration that I’ve never banded her or used something like bdsm toys.
I need some advices how I should act and understand my limits as well as making her understand that this is just while having this type of sex, outside the bedroom she is the queen.
2 comments
I’d suggest asking her what she wants along with what she does not want. Knowing what her and your limits are and staring within them will really help.
Talk to her. Ask her what she likes, doesn’t like, and her limitations. Also maybe come up with a safe word. Let her know that your actions in the bedroom aren’t a reflection of your actions outside of the bedroom. A conversation will probably help with your worries and also give her some reassurance!