I (28m) find the dating apps really don’t seem to be all that fruitful, few matches and even fewer responses when a match does happen.
I just sit around the house, bored, kinda sad but I don’t know what to do and I’m getting pretty lonely. I go out and do a lot of hiking, I’ll often explore the downtown area in my city hoping some kind of situation will present itself where I can maybe talk to a girl, but none really seem to happen. If I get into even a relatively close situation where I could maybe try, I stop myself because I feel like it’s likely inappropriate. For example, cute server at a little outdoor pub I stop and get a beer at. Part of me wants to try and maybe get her number or something, but I remind myself that she’s just working and doesn’t want that so I pay my bill and leave. Other than that it always just seems like I’m out wandering alone among groups of people who are out adventuring but would be weird to just approach, ya know?
Most of my friends are paired up and when they do hang out, they mostly just want to hang at their houses with everyone instead of going out and doing anything. A lot of them also very busy this summer it would seem, some working multiple jobs, which is fair. Recently I met a friends co-worker and asked my friend if maybe she could see if she’s single/interested. She obliged, but never got back to me and it’s been over a week so I guess there was no interest (I’ll double check later).
I am apart of a jiu jitsu group,
which I did not join with the intention of of meeting a woman lol but I feel like a lot of people might suggest joining a club or something to meet new people. I have met a lot of great people there, but we don’t often hang out or anything. Also I wouldn’t talk to any of the women there like that, mainly because they’ve almost become like a second family, that plus it seems like I’m in a weird age bracket where any of the girls there are either 5-10 years older than me and married or 10 years younger than me and that would be totally weird haha
I’d consider myself an average looking guy, but I feel like I’m getting something wrong when it comes to trying to get out there and meeting someone I could connect with on a deeper level. I hope I’m not coming off as some angry internet guy, I promise I’m not angry and don’t blame anyone for my shortcomings haha but I could use advice
3 comments
You’re not doing anything wrong. People are fucking lazy in 2022 when it comes to dating.
What I did and suggest you doing is start approaching girls at concerts, festivals, pubs, parks or just at places you go to – just start walking up to the girls you like – don’t even try thinking beforehand what to say – your mind will fuck yourself over with negative “what if” thoughts and then you’ll just freeze and don’t approach at all.
After you have approached just talk about something that amuses you/makes you laugh + sprinkle it with flirting.
If you want then I got a lot of support from [reading this guide](https://www.reddit.com/user/SoundFoxstripe/comments/oootgp/how_to_date_any_girl_ebook_free_for_limited_time/) when I got back into the dating (was in a relationship for a long time.. kinda lucked out with a girl from school but didn’t have any other experiences).
Helped me a lot in terms of approaching girls, keeping interactions going, flirting, asking for a date etc..
Don’t worry if you are going to get a date in 10 approaches or 50 or whatever number.. just try to learn from your mistakes and calibrate better next time.
I am actively trying tinder right now, I’ve been told by my sister that her friend found me pretty, I also do believe that I am good looking, I am very tall, broad shoulders, a university degree, a car. Anyways I had so little success that I had to pay for tinder boosts. I only got one match from the 3 boosts and she never replied. The only that liked me are way below my league
I truly don’t know what to do too 🙁 this is depressing to feel this unwanted