I do pretty well with socializing when I’m hanging out with 1 or 2 friends. But once the group grows to about 5 or more start having a difficult time socializing and contributing to the discussion. I intend to get more quiet and just make occasional remarks to agree or affirm what someone else has said. I think I get something similar to “stage fright” where I don’t like putting myself out there in front of many people. I’m also nervous to tell stories or make longer statements in large groups because I don’t feel like I get the same positive reaction in front of large groups than I would with 1 or 2 friends.
3 comments
I agree smaller groups, esp. with people you already know, way more comfortable. I think it might vary from person to person and what sort of interactions they’ve had with other people growing up, with people with generally pleasant interactions biased towards less fear/anxiety towards strangers, with people that had a harder time of it having more.
I feel like that is what it is, but depending on your situation, you could potentially try to expand your comfort zone by hanging out with increasingly larger groups, while keeping a relative large percentage of those (if you can) people who you are already familiar with. I feel like I had some opportunities to do that in like college and stuff that I could have probably taken more advantage of if I wanted/thought about it.
TLDR: Really just empathizing because also anxious in bigger group settings – like I need to make sure I know where the exits are and am like constantly on the lookout for ninja attacks or something.
thats what I LIKE about groups! You don’t always have to put out. Letting other people talk is fine. It gives you room to think about what you want to say, and multiple options on who you want to answer.
I’m not everyone’s personal entertainer and I’m not socializing to impress and entertain everyone. I socialize for fun and do it to self-amuse while also caring about people too. In a group, I’ll listen to people talk because I’m curious, and when I have something I really want to say, I’ll say it.