(posting updates as it happens)
Putting in r/sex because sex caused this:(
So I’m a year and a half in woth my boyfriend, we where freinds before, we are best friends. I know all his family he knows mine he talks about moving in with me how much he loves me everything. About 3 years ago I had a sti, it’s a long complicated story but it resulted in sexual/realtionship trama and yeah. I talked to people and they where like since I am cured… I don’t have to tell anyone about my past, it’s the past move on. But I felt like I was hiding soemthing from him and coudlent live myself… I told him everything. He responded saying I’m sorry that happend to you it’s so sad I’m glad you are okay thabk you for telling me. I was so relived. Then he started looking sad in his snaps. He’s a verry quiet shy guy and hard to push emotions oit of and I am like what’s wrong and he’s just been like nothings I’m ok. Next day same sad look (today) and half responses… he slept all the way till 3 wich isn’t unheard of but it just seemed like unmotivated sleep wich he wasn’t like that before I told him… he still looks so sad and won’t tell me why and it’s just feeling distant.. he’s still responding but distant sounding and feeling. This is my best friend and my love, I’m so scared… hopefuly he’s just processing and doesn’t hate me or soemthing. I tought telling this part of my life would make me hate myslef less about it but I feel like my best friend is slipping out of my hands… it’s only been two days but it’s been so painful. I feel like I’m punished once by being manipulated and cursed into that infection and then being punished again by hurting my best friend… idk what I’m asking for advice, understanding, a friend anything I can’t go on like this it hurts my heart so bad( sorry for spelling errors I’m panic typing on the toilet and don’t want to read this over)
Update : I asked if he was mad at me he said it’s not that … and I said what is it and he said nothing he’ll be fine… :/
update : I said okay well are we okay will we see eachother this weekend, he said yeah probly I’m gonna stop pushing now but I still want to throw up and pass away
I tought this would make me feel better
Update: He said good morning shorty .. still sad looking I said good morning ♡ and then he asked how I slept… good sighn?
Update: still snap chatting me still looks sad still giving shorter awnsers then normal before his nap he was much more social then napped and is like yesterday sad looking and shorter awnsers…
2 comments
You are definitely overthinking this, ask him directly whether it’s about your infection and tell him how you feel. This should bring him to answer you…
As always communication is key in every relationship.
Hope this helps
You mentioned a sexual/relationship trauma, without much detail there (I’m not asking for more details, as I’m assuming you don’t want to talk more about it).
If you told him more details about it though, it could be related to that and not the infection itself. An assault/trauma against someone you love has an impact not only on the person assaulted, but also on the people who care about them. The idea that someone you care about had to deal with that in their life can create a lot of negative emotions – towards the world in general, and an overwhelming sense of sadness for the person who was assaulted.
You may have dealt with it an moved on already, but for him it’s like it just happened, since he just found out. It will take some time for him to process it.