I need help communicating with my partner (M32). My partner of 6 years works hard which I appreciate. I do too. He comes home nightly and plays videos game until about mid-night. If he doesn’t come home to play video games he is out fishing. I take pride in the fact that he lives freely and that he is happy but there are times I feel like a mother instead of a partner. Cooking and serving his dinner. Picking up laundry he tossed around the house before doing laundry. Today he got off work early and went fishing til after midnight, and I work late and come home to pick up his mess or walk the dog. I think to myself different ways to talk to him that will get through but feel nothing will be successful. I don’t want to sound like I’m nagging but it’s really exhausting. I need help finding a effective way to communicate with him.

6 comments

  1. I think you kind of already mentioned the best way, that you need to talk to him. You need to communicate that you are feeling like this, like how you explained it in your post. Good luck and all the best!

  2. More than a roommate, because you’re cooking and cleaning for him. Not really a GF, because you don’t mention sex. A lot like a mother. This kind of life would be a NO for me.

  3. You are right by what you’re saying here it’s like you’re not a couple anymore. He ‘s living the single’s life and when he comes home meal, laundry everything is done for him.

    You ‘re starting to be fed up so if nothing is done you’re couple is doomed.

    Are you afraid to talk to him? Does he have anger problems.?

    Talk to him maybe he’s not aware of your feelings for him everything might be hunky dory (Besides his hard work)

  4. You can say something like, “Hey BF, I want to have a conversation with you about the division of household chores.” But come prepared knowing exactly what it is that you would like him to do. Saying something like “I want you to help out more around the house” is vague and unquantifiable. Really think about where it is that you want help and ask for it specifically, like “I’d like you to be responsible for your own laundry” or “I’d like for you to take over cooking/cleanup three nights a week.” Good luck!

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