So my boyfriend(21M) and i(20F) have been together for 6 years now. The thing is we never had sex and this is growing on me a lot in the past time. We are both virgins , we tried doing it. The first few times were more like a “problem” on his side..like getting soft real quik and i understood that.First years we had a pretty great sex life without the sex part ofc but it was pretty good.Well since we moved together we rarely even did something, we tried to do it again but my problem is on my side because i just can’t handle the pain , it’s just way to much.
Now we rarely do something, barely anything sexual and it’s frustrating because i do have needs i tried talking nothing happend and idk..i just wanted to rant.
(Now here comes the comment : srry if my English is not great:))
4 comments
Have you two talked about it? If so, how did those conversations go? If not, why not?
It sounds like you’re both putting a lot of pressure on yourselves to have penis-in-vagina sex, but that’s not the only kind of sex. You can have oral sex, do handjobs/fingering, use toys together, etc.
If it hurts that much have you asked a professional? A doctor? It seems more mental than physical but that also can develop in vaginismus (in no way im diagnosing you im just thinking bout options)
First – You need to see a doctor and find out why you’re having pain every time you have intercourse – this is not normal. Are you indulging in foreplay, do you need to use a lubricant? Then once that’s sorted you need to talk to your partner and discuss the real issue here. It could be that you’re just not compatible. You’re still young and this is no way to live the rest of your life.