How to take life more lightly/positively being an atheist?

15 comments

1. Atheism =/= nihilism.

   This feeling that you are just going to work until you die has nothing to do with your lack of faith, it’s a seperate thing. You’re in a rut and need to break out of it.

2. I am agnostic, and religion and faith is something that I couldn’t possibly care any less. So that’s one burden off my shoulder ever since becoming one.

   I wouldn’t one up your experiences, resulting in your take on such beliefs. But, if you see it in a nihilistic way where it’s ✨over✨, once it’s over; You won’t see the impact you have done onto others.

   See, it’s not what you take when you leave this world behind you. It’s what you leave behind you when you go. May it be tangible or not.

   But, as an agnostic, I don’t really relate my problems to my beliefs. They would make me believe harder in my faith (hypothetically) if ever. I just think of it as “fuck this, let’s get this over with and continue doing what I like”.

3. Seems like a fine place to ask this question in my opinion.

   Everyone is different so what I’m gonna tell you might not stick but more just giving my opinion and hope that’s OK and really hope it helps.

   Background: grew up super catholic, I mean church about 3 times a week with daily Bible study level. People of high faith is what I was used to.

   After becoming an adult and joking the military and finding myself a bit I am now an agnostic theist. Just my choice, if you prefer the atheist point of view I can respect that.

   Given that we have slightly similar stories I think I at least partially understand where you are coming from. I do think there might be some depression mixed in there. Also it could be that you are in a stagnant life position. Job you don’t like, not many friends you can enjoy your time with type of things. Kinda makes you feel like you are in the movie groundhog day maybe.

   It’s easy to get down and not see what the point of going on is in those situations.

   As far as advice on how to get out of it there are a bunch of different answers, some might work, some might not. Seeking professional help is a big one. Alot of men see asking for help as a weakness I felt that way for a long time but sometimes asking for help is the best sign of strength their is. We all can’t do it alone. Finding hobbies you enjoy or picking up old hobbies again that you liked might help also. Putting yourself out there with old and new friends to do things. Looking deeper into your career path and how to change it into something you might enjoy more. I’m not going to say love your job since that is near impossible for most people,but something you don’t dread is a huge step.

   Now as far as deep life meaning I can’t even begin to help with that. I think it has alot to do with finding a life worth living though. Things that make you feel good and enjoy the ride, also excepting that sometimes it’s going to suck. Like having to go to work to make money to do the things you want to do. So I think it is kind of a balancing act with that.

   I wish you all the best friend!

   *excuse typos, I’m mobile

4. You gotta find hope somewhere. I consider myself a Atheist but I will rarely turn down a religious invite offered to me by someone unless there is a huge red flag.

   Join a group that does good in the area. Even if it is religious group hosting it. Atheist who do good are doing it because it’s good not because of a reward in the next chapter if you will.

   Once you give some time to others you see how positive others lives are by your actions. It gives you hope that even though it all doesn’t matter it was at least good for someone and you were part of that.

5. nihilism doesn’t have to mean pessimism.

   Nothing matters. Which means you get to define what matters. I am a very optimistic nihilist. There is no meaning to life. What I have is short and unimportant in the scheme of things, but that means I’m free. I can decide exactly how and why to spend the precious time I have. I’m not beholden to anybody. There’s no hand waiting to be paid.

   You have full control and choice over what you do. What does it mean to experience life? Does that mean having and raising children? Does that mean traveling the world? Does that mean becoming excellent at solving rubiks cubes?

   YOU get to pick. So pick. Religion is great for giving the directionless some direction. It’s narrow, but it’s direction: Do this to Live Well.

   Without that you need (get to!) decide. What you can’t do is just let life sweep you up and carry you along. Pick something you want to do/be/live and pursue it.

6. I mean, it’s not like Catholicism takes life lightly and positively. So I think your problem might not be being an atheist but probably still recovering from from being raised Catholic, lol.

   Also, it’s possible to take a softer view of atheism. More like “I don’t know what’s next” rather than “we die and disappear.”

   Try this. Take a religious POV and try to imagine what heaven for eternity would be like. And I stress eternity. Play it out in your mind. Can you imagine what you would be doing for eternity that wouldn’t just get boring and meaningless?

   Ever see the show “The Good Place?” I don’t want to spoil anything but the ending is pretty damn profound.

7. What I did was become religious. There are a lot of different ways that can look that aren’t like Catholicism.

8. I was raised non-religious and continue to be very non-religious. I remember in my twenties wrestling with similar feelings. Most Atheists I would try and connect with were just angry communists. I found a lot of my friends who were religious seemed to have a place and built in support from their religion. I was slightly envious until I came to terms with my own faith or my acceptance of non-belief and I am much happier. I connected with people that were secular humanists, humanists and non-judgmental people of faith. I stopped subscribing to the midwestern work ethic that unwavering belief, hard work and perseverance pays off in the long run. There are secular humanist organizations that can give a sense of community similar to religion. The job thing is hard and it took me a long time to find a work/life balance.

9. > we’re just fighting for money our whole life so that, in the end, we can die and disappear.

   The good thing is – it’s perfectly OK to do just that, literally nobody would complain. But if it’s not enough for you – just find yourself a S.M.A.R.T. goal and move towards it.

   > without constantly thinking about our lack of importance in the universe

   Try to grasp the size of the observable universe, then realize that there’s WAY MORE stuff beyond the observation horizon that we’ll never see and relax. In the grand scheme of things we’re all unimportant for the universe.

   Find yourself something that lets you unwind and relax. I do triathlons and long-distance hikes. Some people paint or do other kinds of art. Others meditate or turn to religion. Whatever helps you live (as opposed to survive) is a right thing to do.

10. My advice is not to make your atheism a religion, or to live it as some kind of protest or opposition to other religious beliefs.

    I’ve been around long enough to see that there is a wife range of *need* within each of us for a belief structure. Some find it profoundly helpful. Some it does nothing for.

    Neither are wrong, or superior.

    Making peace with others choices you can’t change is helpful. As is finding purpose in your own life, whatever that is.

11. Watch Rick and Morty.

    “Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everybody’s gonna die. Come watch TV?”
    –Morty

12. i understand where you’re coming from, OP! Sorry to hear that currently you are struggling.

    In terms of faith, I’m questioning; it’s as if I want to believe in God but have too many Biblical questions and doubts and just…uncertainties.

    I understand completely about what you mean by ‘going through a bad phase.’ I’ve been there too. It’s rough and awful, and I’m trying not to be vacuous but I do honestly promise that things will get better. I know it may be difficult to see that now but *things will get better*. Time heals all things; *improves* all things. I don’t believe this has anything, necessarily, to do with *religious* faith but rather a belief in general.

    I’d state things for mental health, like yoga, eating right, going on walking, speaking your mind more freely—but I feel that may sound dismissive and condescending. I do not wish to be that way. “Smile and think of a happy” sounds mean too. All I can promise is that things will get better. Learning to deal with struggles and how they weigh on the mind has been something I’ve had to learn, as well.

13. To be honest, since I am atheist life got better, simpler, and more worth living. Also, my morals are based on me being a decent human being and based on logic not fright of hell.

    I think you mistake atheism with some kind of nihilism. I think it is just a phase. Don’t focus only on the bad side of life. Try to focus on the good part. It is true that everything will perish. But it doesn’t matter since you will perish too, does it?

14. It doesn’t sound like your atheism is the root of your problem, the nihilism sounds more like the culprit. Nihilism kinda fails on a lot of levels and can really drag you into a hole. May I suggest you check out Existentialism (Nothing matters except what you add value, or choose, to) Utilitarianism (Biggest benefits to most people) and the Good Life Theory? Maybe a fresh perspective will help

15. I’m a practicing Roman Catholic myself and I haven’t been going to church as often as I used to mainly because of my work schedule. I still believe but I know I haven’t felt this far in life. I got nothing against atheists let alone anyone because we are all human at the end of the day.