I (23Fhave been in a relationship for 6 years with my partner (23M). We lived together for the last 2. The resent months I’ve been starting to feel different about our relationship mainly that my romantic feelings have kind of disappeared. The thing is, my boyfriend is great – he’s sweet and caring, we still have a physical relationship and we still do things together which is why I don’t know how or if I should end the relationship. I consider him my best friend, and I don’t want to hurt him, but at the same time I feel like I need to be alone. I’ve been thinking about having a break for the relationship as opposed to breaking up, but I’m not sure how he would react to it. Even more, he is leaving in the middle of august for 4 months for a boarding school kinda thing (don’t know how to explain exactly, it’s a danish thing)
Any advice on the situation would be greatly appreciated.
TLDR: I don’t know if I should stay with my boyfriend of 6 years, even though we have no real issues.
5 comments
2 options. Say nothing and see how it feels when he’s gone for 4 months. If you can’t wait for him to get back or dread his return. you know your answer.
Option 2. Tell him you want to take the next 4 months and take a break from each other. .He can date someone so can you. This most likely will end your relationship so think hard before going with this one.
Hello 🙂 i wonder if you have finally moved past the honeymoon faze in your relationship
It may be somthing to read about before making any decisions. Its somthing that happens to every relationship. This faze can last anywhere from 5 months to a few years.
Hmm. I guess the only other option is to toss a coin.
Heads you stay
Tails you leave.
This works because while the coin is in the air youll know what your hoping for. And that will give you an anwser on what you really want.
Breaks are bullshit. He will find someone else.
Looks like you’re getting 4 months off either way.
6 years is a good run. It’ll probably fade a little by then anyway. If you’re bored, you can always roll the dice.
Alternatively, put in a bit of work, and find ways to make it more exciting, and tell him you’re happy, but could do with a little more edge.
You were a teenager when you got together. Hopefully, you have *both* done a lot of growing and changing since then. And maybe that growing and changing has led to “you know, I really like all these things about my boyfriend, but I’m no longer sure that he’s right”.
That’s OK. It definitely makes thinking about what to do hard: you cannot possibly point to something “wrong” with the relationship, so the natural reaction is to just keep going.
>I’ve been thinking about having a break for the relationship as opposed to breaking up
No no no no no no no.
Taking “A Break” is something that can possibly work for situations where both people involved have some specific issues that for whatever reason they cannot work through together.
Taking “A Break” so you can decide whether or not you actually want to be with someone is just setting everyone up for hurt. Because what are you expecting? That you’ll both be single for half a year? That you’ll be free to date whoever and then after a few months you’ll get back together as if nothing happened? That you’ll be celibate and he can do whatever and that you’ll honestly not care whether he had nightly orgies or not once the months of the break are over?
If you’re not happy, break up. Go do your thing. He does his thing. Maybe in the long run you’ll end up back together. But don’t force some arbitrary timeline of “between August 1 and December 31, we are both single and starting on January 1 we will be a couple again.”