I (20f) have had (a few) male partners, absolutely zero of them have felt good. This includes long term boyfriends and casual hookups.
If the penetration doesn’t “hurt” in the traditional sense, it feels like just plain pressure that is uncomfortable and I will the sex to end asap. The pain feels sort of like a stinging pain, almost like they are ripping me from the insides. Lubrication is never an issue with me, and I have tried many forms of added lube.
I don’t have an STD, tried every different position on the planet, have seen gynecologists for birth control and check ups so I’m all set anatomy wise. Add on top of that, I CAN orgasm through self-play.
I wish I enjoyed sex SO much. Any ideas?
8 comments
Try uro/physiogynecologist (I don’t know if that’s actual naming it’s my loose translation)! It’s something like vagina training and the doc itself would check if everything is okay, just gynecologists don’t know everything.
Some other things I can think of:
-Maybe you need a lot of foreplay, maybe it was too less for youm
-weren’t your partners too big/rough for you?
-Did you want to have penetrative sex with them? Like weren’t you stressed too much/aren’t you traumatized about something from your past?
Sounds like vaginismus. You should see a gyno and potentially get pelvic floor therapy.
How much time do you spend on foreplay *before* oral or fingering?
A great question for your doctor!
A bad question for strangers on the internet.
Yeah. I have this issue on and off too. That stinging sensation. Exactly that.
I always need to warm up for quite awhile.
Thank you for asking this question. I’m seeing a gynaecologist at the moment but definitely am going to look up other options as advised by the commenters here.
I have/had vaginismus. Basically the pelvic floors would spasm when something was being entered in my vagina. I couldn’t fit a tampon in there let alone a penis. What may have been… odd advice from my gynecologist but he said find a partner you can trust and have him start with a pinky and then keep moving up in fingers once you start to feel more comfortable.
If it is vaginismus, a LOT of lube can help. Also mine is psychological, I think most is? I got over mine before it was necessary but my doc was going to start prescribing anti anxiety medicine possibly even a painkiller. I literally couldn’t even get a q-tip to do a swab in the doctors office without begging him to stop though so I’m not sure what the degrees of severity are. Best of luck!
Vulvodynia
Maybe your pelvic floor is too tight try belly breathing and stretches like happy baby, yoga squat etc