It’s ok to let go of someone not right for you

Some people seem decent and kind and compatible when you look at their list of features you want

But there is such a thing as social or personality incompatibility

Little things about this person I found were not exactly as I imagined or hoped my future long term partner would be like

Was sad they didn’t feel same as me even though I independently and objectively are a great candidate

Then realized that I probably felt just as lukewarm about them when you strip away all the anxious attachment I have and the need I have to be with someone good for once

But good isn’t enough. A good person doesn’t necessarily mean I’d be happy.

I’d never think of myself as a cheating person but in my mind if I had ended up with them I’d have thought about it or more likely considered leaving because our life led together would have been so poor in terms of communication and so different,

Our spending habits, values, sense of humor, patterns of socializing, things we enjoy talking about, emotional intelligence, everything was different.

I need love to feel more like love but it is great that I am willing to settle for someone who is more boring or more reliable

I think it’s maturity on my part as I’m not following the hype over physical attraction, sex, leading people on, playing games, any number of shitty advice on the Internet that yes applies to initial dating but not long term love