My boyfriend and I have been together since a year. I was his first girlfriend ever. He sort of sucked at sex at first but with time he’s gotten better though I always have to end up making him finish whether it’s getting physical in person or phone sex. He has never made me finish and is well aware but does nothing about it. He fingers me for about 2 minutes and then that’s it. I’m too shy to put it out there again and forcefully make it happen because that would just be awkward. What to do about it?
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some men even knows girls can orgasm and need to do it. Or he simply dosen’ know how to do it. I suggest you to teach him how to do it
Speak to him about it. He’s regularly putting himself *inside* your body. You can have a conversation about “hey, I’m not really enjoying the fact that we’re not ever focused on me. It’s kind of killing my desire to have sex.”
First thing you can do is simply ask him what he likes. Some guys do tend to like it when you direct them on what to do. Like for example: guiding his hand to where you want it to be, Telling him verbally what to do as he’s doing it (like whether to go hard or gentle etc) and also moaning at the same time. I personally have noticed that being more “reactive” when your man touches you, makes them hornier and makes them want to pleasure you more. Though to be fair that doesn’t apply to all men.
Only two minutes of fingering? Hell, I go down and get hers first, then get in there while she’s more sensitive. I think it’s the level of foreplay.
He’s either ignorant or selfish.
Either way you need to push through the concern about awkwardness and be direct with him that he needs to step up. You’ve tolerated this for too long as it is.
Are you really going to allow your shyness to keep you stuck in this situation?
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A fun solution could be sitting him down and putting on a show for him. Show him exactly what you like and what it looks like when you orgasm.
Then he’ll no excuse, he will have seen what you like, how to tell if you’ve cum and (like someone else mentioned) that women can cum.
You’re his first, so i’m hoping he may just not realise that you need to orgasm as well.
Sex ed seriously sucks, and a lot of the time, people get the impression that sex is about guy putting it in, guy cumming, sex ends.
But it really isn’t – so hopefully he’s just unaware that sex is meant to be for both of you and the goal is not his orgasm, but both of you.
Talk to him and explain that you haven’t had an orgasm yet and the sex is too focused on him, and that needs to change so you enjoy it as much as he does.
If he’s a decent guy, he’ll make sure you get yours. If he’s not decent.. there’s no point to sex with him.
Let me help you you’ll finish every time
Sex only gets better if you communicate. If you’re too shy to put it out there i.e. tell him what feels good vs. what doesn’t during oral, my best advice would be to start incorporating clitoral stimulation toys during sex. Frame it as you want to try something new vs. him not doing something right. Try using it on yourself during sex to make yourself finish & maybe seeing you orgasm will turn him on enough to make him want to get you there every time.