We Just Changed

2 comments

1. I mean, yeah, people change. We’ve talked a lot about this in our marriage.

   The thing is, it’s weird to expect your partner not to change. Case in point: we got married at 21 and 22 years old. We were immature, and more reckless. We were still in school. I was hot headed and equated heated yelling with passion. He disagreed, which was a good thing, but for his faults, he was crappy with money and didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life.

   Thank GOODNESS we changed!

   We changed together. We had mutual responsibilities, we worked at communicating effectively, and became *good* at it. We worked hard at school, and careers, and managing our growing family, so that we could become financially solvent. We supported each other through the times we changed our mind about careers, or where to live, and body changes both positive and negative.

   Some people think, “well my partner isn’t the same person they were when I married them.” Which is insane. Who stays the same throughout their lives? And sometimes changes are just not able to be dealt with. That’s okay! We all have our limits. But expecting your partner not to change is silly and unrealistic. What they mean is “My partner changed into someone I cannot or do not want.”

   My partner is not the same man I married. I am not the same woman he married.

   Thank goodness.

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