I’m (15F) and a boyfriend (16M).
He introduced me to his whole family as his girlfriend in his Birthday. At that time I really didn’t worry of how they’d view me or not, his parents did not engage a conversation with me but his mother did gave a quite expensive perfume as a gift. I really didn’t know why she gave me a gift because my boyfriend’s the one who has a birthday. They also did not bother to look at me but his auntie is quite fond of me than his mom. They even included me to their family picture for his birthday. That was July 12.
Now July 24, now unsure. My boyfriend opened up to me that his parents are encouraging him or rather just telling him that he’d find a bunch of girls in college once he becomes an engineer. As if they have different plans with him. He said that they said that to him before and after they met me personally.
I would like to add that me and my boyfriend have a genuine relationship and a strong connection to each other. We have set future plans for our future and we have promises together.
Basically, my questions are:
1.How do I handle this situation?
2. If ever they try to separate us, would respecting his parents opinion the best choice or should I fight for him?
3. How can I comfort my boyfriend?
TLDR: My boyfriend’s parents keeps telling him that he’ll find a lot of new girls in college despite knowing me as his girlfriend.
3 comments
You’re 15. It isn’t that serious, yet. Just go with it, ignore the parents. Focus on your happiness as well as your boyfriends. You still have a lot to figure out both personally and together before you can start planning for the future. Nothing at that age is ever set in stone.
I guess it’s not about you personally. The parents simply think you are both too young for a serious relationship. And they are right, because
1. In your age, children still live with their parents and are financially and in many other ways still dependent on them. If for example you would get married at this point, the parents would get a lot of additional burden, had to live with ther kid’s spouse in one house, help financially etc. That’s simply an asshole thing to do to your parents! Of course they are concerned. Or, if you have kids at this age, most guys would have to forget about their education and career and begin to work hard on low paying jobs to sustain the new family financially. Of course parents want a future better than that for their kid.
2. Even if finance is not a problem in their family, teenagers are often still not emotionally mature enough and don’t have enough life experience to start and maintain a stable serious relationship. They don’t know yet how relationships work, what to look for in their potential partners, what are the red flags. Which results in poor choices and shitty relationships. Also teenagers often simply change their minds as they grow rapidly and realize they have different needs. They meet new people and get infatuated easily. For all these reasons early relationships statistically fall apart very often. And the parents know it.
Of course after reading this you think to yourself that it’s not your case and your relationship is serious and mature. This is how infatuation works and I don’t expect otherwise)
On the bright side, consider that you can actually enjoy it and be happy a lot with your bf even if the relationship turns out short lived. Get new experience and don’t take it too seriously. And make sure you use contraception properly)
When 15/16 year olds get serious it often time results in a pregnancy. This is reason enough that your bf’s parents want to discourage a serious relationship.