I F21 recently found out my bf26 who I have 1 kid and expecting another with is speaking to his ex behind my back. I’m not sure as to what they are talking about bc when he’s asleep and I get his phone he wakes up soon after. This ex is a known drug addict and lost all her kids due to it. She ended up killing one due to her addiction due to her being high on meth while driving. He had been acting off prior to me finding out. He doesn’t do much with our daughter anymore. He holds her when he has to and it’s like pulling teeth to get him to do anything for us. He’s been trying to shove it on his mom and grandma to do it when he can easily do it. He hardly spends time with me anymore. When I tried to spend time with him he bitches. I don’t know what to do at this point bc I’m 20 weeks pregnant with nowhere to go.
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There’s this book called ‘How to talk so kids will listen and listen so kids will talk’. It essentially suggests empathy as a method of improving communication.
I think if you are finding that you’re nagging and it isn’t working, then a different approach might open up the communication between you and your SO.
There’s definitely some red flags though if he’s lying and speaking to his ex, so do keep an eye out/look for more evidence. If it’s not healthy, you should consider leaving – if he’s having an emotional affair or cheating etc.