Tough Spot, moving overseas

So I’m (40m) Canadian and married to a Japanese citizen (39f) for 13 years, we have two girls 11 and 9, dual citizens. All live in Canada, spouse is here as a permanent resident.

I taught English in Japan in the mid 2000s, ended up staying longer than planned because I met someone who would later become my spouse. English teaching was not a long term career job and I always planned on going back home to start a career, it wasn’t as easy as I hoped but I’m now fairly established in what I do; work for one of the big Canadian banks (all I’ll say is that they have blue in their logo), product development/management for credit products. Spouse doesn’t really work (never had a career even in Japan), but they volunteer in the community. Them not working was absolutely NOT a point of contention, I’m the main source of income for the family and we live comfortably. They’ve also made a lot of wonderful friends (Japanese and non-Japanese), did a much better job than I could ever do if the situations were reversed.

Since the kids were little, spouse goes back to Japan with them every summer and spends time with their family. I’m totally supportive of this, I can’t go as often because of work, can’t take 2 months off.

Recently however, my spouse has been getting the itch to move back to Japan permanently, be closer to their parents, etc etc. They have a great time while they visit but I feel these trips distort the actual reality of living there because they have no responsibility while there.

There are obviously logistical and rather large financial costs of moving a family overseas that haven’t been considered, all costs borne out by me which I am not thrilled about.. Visa won’t be a problem but for me, my biggest issue is securing a job. My spouse isn’t in a position to earn anything even close to me, even in Japan and that puts more pressure on me, cost of living can be an issue. I’m not confident in my Japanese language abilities which could ultimately be overcome, but more than that, I’m not confident in finding a job in my current field, I’ve searched and more often than not, came up empty. My only real option is to find a new job here with a company who has overseas offices and try and transfer over at some point, be an expat, but my fear is that my spouse won’t wait that long (who can predict when they’ll get a new job?!) and just end up leaving me..

I’m not totally opposed moving overseas, but it has to make career and financial sense, right? That is my counter-argument. I never said “no” but I can’t put a specific timeline to it and that frustrates my spouse.. i fear that it may ultimately lead to a divorce which I don’t want.

TL:DR I realize this may paint me as a hypocrite as I brought my spouse to Canada in the first place. Looking for thoughts on how to deal with a spouse who wants to go back to their home country despite being fairly established overseas and you being the main income earner. Anyone who experienced this, how did you navigate this? Happy to answer any follow ups