You know how people always say “be you” when trying to be social? Yeah that never works for me. I have to put on a “mask” and act like I’m not who I really am when it comes to everyone. I admit I have flaws and try to work on them. But honestly every time I have ever let my mask slip it seems no one ever understands or even likes what they see underneath. Not my friends, not even my parents.
Now I’m in my thirties and still find that even with what few truly close friends I do have that I cannot ever let that mask slip. Because if I do I’ll lose them because who I really am isn’t someone that can be liked.
So I keep wearing the mask, and I have to constantly check myself to make sure I never let the real me show. But at the same time I wish I could meet someone who was fine with me without the mask. Because it’s not having to constantly and tirelessly making sure I have that mask on that sucks the most, it’s feeling like no one will ever really understand you that hurts the most.
1 comment
Make a throwaway, explain more about your real self, maybe you’ll find some people who will understand.
But yeah, most people’ll be mean. Be prepared for that too.