For context, we just had our midterm exam last week and some of the teachers started to announce the scores today. I was extremely happy with mine because I got quite good scores but my friend got quite lower scores than he expected. What should I say to him when he tells me his score looking absolutely sad? Should I just say ‘it’s alright’ or something? Thanks in advance
5 comments
Git gud scrub
It can be really hard to know what to say. You want to help your friend feel better. But different things help different people. I would start with something that validates his feelings then ask what would help, “I’m sorry you are so down about your test score. What kind of support can I give you? Distraction (find something fun to do to keep his mind off), listen while you talk, practical help with studying?”
I’d start a study group and ask your friend to join. You get to hang out with your buddies and help this friend without singling them out.
How bad of a score are we talking here?
MerriWyllow is giving great advice and I think you should follow that! The reason I’m bothering to write this is because I want you to know a little thing. Yes, it’s great that you are concerned about your friend (I’ve been in a similar situation but no one extended their hand to me) but I’ll have you know that you shouldn’t be surprised if, for some time, till your friend’s come to terms with his/her marks, he/she doesn’t want to speak much with you. It might just be that talking to you reminds your friend of their lower scores.
To summarise, I’d follow MerriWyllow’s advice but don’t be offended *right away* if your friend doesn’t want to open up to you or speak to you for a bit. Of course, if such a thing continues on for long to the point where your friend’s not friendly with you anymore or is completely avoiding you, it’s time to move. Jealousy is an evil force that’s surprisingly strong and hard to overcome at times, you know?