For me the initial phase of talking to someone is the easiest. You just talk about basic things and gain insight about their personality. But after that it feels like there’s nothing to say and I’m just in a loophole of not really getting close with someone but instead being the “cool to be around when he’s around” kind of friend. Like there’s no common ground or anything.
4 comments
Maybe try talking about how you feel about different subjects and have them tell you how they feel as well.
What do you have in common with these friends? Why are you friends?
you’ve gotta figure out why you’re friends to begin with. from what you’re saying about “no common ground,” it seems like you’re trying to force a friendship rather than letting it unfold naturally as real friendships tend to develop, through shared interests and commonalities that you can talk about.
I’d say, get clear on what it is that you like about them and why you consider them friends to begin with. ultimately, friendship is something that should be natural and not forced where you actively think about the things you want to talk about. as with any strong relationships, it should just flow!
I just inject politics into everything. That usually gets the ball rolling.