Men do you feel forced to be tough when you’re out with your gf/wife, why or why not?

13 comments

1. Forced? No.

   I do it willingly.

2. Honestly yes. When I’m alone I usually just ignore things as I’m like who cares. But if I’m with my gf I have to maintain my respect so I roll my eyes and be mr tough guy.

3. Definitely not forced. My wife is sensitive and smaller than me so I naturally automatically go into protective mode if there’s danger (or a spider, she hates spiders).

4. No I don’t have violent fantasies of imaginary bad guys “messing with me” while I’m eating dinner or drinking in a bar.

5. You can touch me. But never ever touch my wife or daughter. I will end you.

   I am not someone to start a fight ever. I also only have been in a fight once. But just don’t.

6. No! But I had a confrontation with someone who wanted to act tough in front of their girl. His dynamic changed once he realized how aggressive I am compared to him. Basically don’t embarrass yourself in front of your woman, if you’re no sure of the outcome ( and no I did NOT start the issue)

7. My wife has grabbed me to stop me getting into an altercation with someone so I think I’m probably too tough for her. I don’t know exactly what “messing with me” is but if it’s just verbal I’ll ignore them, if it’s physical I’ll warn them, it if continues I guess we find out who is hardest. If I’m with the wife I’ll just leave.

   The difference would 100% be location, I don’t go anywhere alone I’m not regularly at so leaving does not solve the problem. With the wife it’s more one-off places so leaving isn’t an issue.

8. If they hurt or threaten my partner, they’re a dead man walking. If they threaten me, I’m just de-escalating and getting the hell out of there.

9. You just be you. When a threat emerges (rarely) then you become tough.

10. No. Violence brings legal trouble and I have a career to worry about.

11. No. Not really.

    I’m protective of **her,** sure. But I don’t feel like I’m forced to act like a tough guy. My wife knows I’m very non-violent, it’s usually my last resort to an altercation.

    Trying to goad me into a fight or a shouting match is kind of a losing battle, especially if I can identify that as the objective. Because I’m just going to either walk away, or lay in with the thickest sarcasm I can muster.

    I don’t really need to prove anything to my wife anymore. She knows who I am, and she loves me for that.

12. In my almost 37 years of life, I’ve never been “messed with” by a stranger. I do go into a very defensive mode while in public with my family. I Naturally put myself between traffic, crowded areas, and separate us from weird situations that seem like they have potential to be problematic i.e. groups of people drinking excessively or loud and boisterous people.

13. No need. You remain calm, smile, and tell them “Is this what your life has become? Attempting to raise yourself by lowering me in front of my wife out of jealousy? You are a sad, sterile, impotent man if that’s the case”. Then when they try to turn it up laugh and move on. It may not seem like it, but that gets in their heads worse than any beating you can deliver or bravado you could put out.