Seeking to understand the general trend on how long one should wait before introducing someone you’re dating to your close friends. What factors do you consider before deciding to say, go on a double date or plan a picnic or group event together? How soon do you think is “too soon”? Do you use the meetup as an opportunity to gauge how well they would fit into your social life?
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I think this highly depends on you and the person you are seeing. I personally want to see how someone I’m romantically interested in will do around my friends. Are they awkward? Do they socialize well with new people? Can I act like myself? I’d rather know these things early and not waste my time.
Worth noting that when they do meet your friends it shouldn’t be at some personal event like a birthday party. Maybe a brewery or some sort of activity.
I don’t do double dates, but generally if my people are out somewhere then I see no problem with inviting someone I’m dating pretty quickly. But to me, that’s nothing big and within our friendship group, we’ve met a ton of our friend’s dates and it’s not really viewed as some big “oooh they’re together” thing. Now family? Different thing, at least 6 months because I’m only introducing to parents if I’m really feeling this thing has legs on it. Friends? If there’s a thing going on “hey my friend’s are doing this thing, wanna come”. Honestly I don’t really gauge these things as anything more than a fun a night/day out.
I don’t.
If I still had a social circle that was living in my area, I would probably give it a handful of dates before introducing a woman into that dynamic. Pretty much everyone has moved away over the years given it’s a HCOL region, and the pandemic was the nail in the coffin.
I would just want to establish a deep-enough connection on a few dates before introducing her to other parts of my life. Family? 6+ months easily
I hang out with friends and family regularly so someone I’m dating is likely to meet them early as well. I don’t see why some people consider it a big deal. I’d rather know sooner rather than later that my date can get along with people I care about and regularly interact with.
Last year I was dating a new person during covid. We were super good quarantine buddies. Once covid was down enough to have an outdoor event with my friends in their back yard, I took her to meet them. We had been dating for about 5 months.
She got drunk AF, made out with my friend, told my friend I had been talking shit about him behind his back, and then started propositioning people for cocaine.
I don’t do cocaine and we had never done cocaine together. My friend knew me well enough to know not to believe some drunk girl. No real harm was caused… But, we didn’t last.
A couple months later I met a new woman. We hit it off in some ways, but came to the conclusion on our first date that we probably should just be friends. She was new to the area and needed new friends. I could tell she was PERFECT for my friends circle.
The second time I saw her was to go to a BBQ at my friend’s house to meet everyone. She hit it off with everyone just like I predicted. And, boom, she’s got a whole new friends group and even a couple of guys who were very happy to see her show up.
We tried to hang out as friends a couple more times… But, that just didn’t work out. We’re pretty crazy about each other. So, after about a month of trying not to date, we’re inseparable. And, all my friends still think she’s amazing and she’s even made her own friends in my extended circles.
So, sometimes never is the right time… And other times it’s right away… 🤷♂️
Honestly, it depends on when it feels right for you. If I’m inviting a guy to meet my friends, it means I like him and think there’s long-term potential. If my friends like him and get along well with him, then I think it’s a good sign. However, I always ask the guy if he feels comfortable with meeting my friends beforehand to gauge how interested he is in being part of my life. I find that people who are truly into you won’t have any reservations about meeting your friends.
I don’t need to involve anyone else in my dating life unless we are in a committed relationship. I’ve never had a dude meet my parents because they don’t need to be attached to someone who will dissappear in a week. Same goes for my friends.
Also, I don’t want someone else’s opinion to shape mine. Once your friends don’t like someone, the vibe changes and it’s hard to see the guy the same way. It’s also hard to break off a bad match once your friends like them.
My actual close friends? Anytime. My real friends can meet anyone at anytime because it wouldn’t be weird either way. Those are the people I trust and who are important to me.
I honestly feel it is wise to be clear with the person you are romantically connected with if what you want out of the connection is compatible with what they want.
Because if you are building towards long term and they only see you as casual, introducing the person to friends might make you build a certain deeper connection with them that they otherwise don’t have- you’ll feel closer, they won’t.
Being on the same page is really important. And also listening to your friends if they like/dislike the person.
To me it introducing friends isn’t something grand so range from date 3 onwards. That being said, the set up would be casual, if you’re talking about properly meeting then I’d say 2 months
My boyfriend and I met each other’s friends after our third date.
My friends know me really well and having them meet and see how the guy I was seeing was important to me. How does he treat my friends, how does his friends get along with my friends and etc.
These things are important to me because my friends have seen me through various stages of my life and will tell it to me straight, give me their honest opinions about the guy.M!
I side with the 90s philosophers and story-tellers the “Spice Girls” on this one.
If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends.
I don’t have any friends in the area I live in, so it would probably be quite a while if it happened at all. I’m not one to bring people I’m dating into the rest of my life unless it’s a very serious relationship.
Once I’m in a relationship or when it’s convenient.
After we’re exclusive and way before they meet my parents.
Depends on personality- there’s no “too soon” for me to meet anyone these days. I’ve met a girl’s circle of friends on a first date once. In my experience though, “too late” can be a sign they’re on the fence about you or aren’t looking for something long term. When I’m seriously jazzed about a girl, I want everyone on the planet to meet her and see how awesome she is.
I’d give it at least 3-4 weeks at minimum. To make sure it’s not a flash in the pan. It still could be, but at least there’s been some sweat equity put in.
You don’t … your friends will fuck em
I like to introduce people I’m dating to my friends because it’s very important to me that they are not socially awkward and can hang in groups. I don’t do the whole smell test thing though- I am not interested in my partner or potential partner being vetted, questioned, and picked apart. The only opinions I put real weight in are those of my mom and 2 of my best friends, so if I think a certain friend won’t respect those boundaries, they just won’t be invited around until we are a completely established couple.
Guess it depends how you view this meeting. If it were a “hey this is my boyfriend and I want you to meet” him type thing, then maybe once we’re official. But for me and my best friend’s we often meet each other’s dates in a casual set up. My husband met my friend’s at a bar, we were at one bar and my friend text and asked said she was nearby and I just said “my friends are over there let’s pass through quick” and that was date 2. I met my sister’s guy at a mutual friend’s party. She just bought him through and it was chill and simple, so again, I guess how seriously you view this meet. 9/10 with us it’s just “something is going on here wanna come”. If he becomes a boyfriend then cool, if he doesn’t, then cool. if it were a thing like a wedding, christening, an occasion where my parents would be, that’d probably be a couple months at least after we’re official
A few months, probably? Introducing someone to my friends usually means interrupting D&D night so I can introduce said new person, because that’s the only time we ever all get together. We have a “no partners” rule, so while I can definitely invite a new person along for a night, and we’ll break out Exploding Kittens or Goat Lords or something to play instead, it does cancel D&D for the week, and I’m hesitant to do that on any sort of regular basis. We like having our partner-free space every week to vent about what’s going on in our lives that we might not want to vent about at home. Eg, one of us might want to vent about how frustrated he is with how his wife wants to handle a parenting issue, and it gives him a place to do it since his wife doesn’t play with us.
Pretty quickly, probably within 5 dates—if I’m concerned about introducing them to my friends then I’d question why I’m dating them.
Family it’s more likely only once it’s an established relationship as my parents don’t need to know about my sex life anymore than I need to know about theirs. Being a proper ‘thing’ gives it the dimensions it needs for an intro to make sense to me.
3-5 years
Depends on the course of the relationships, but I would say that 4-6 months should be a marker where you might want to think whether to be exclusive (because I can’t fathom dating multiple people for that long, at some point you need to think of moving forward with only one person), and thus shortly after that point think about involving friends, but also very casual and easy going activities like drinks, cafes or some home party. Big events (marriages, etc) later. Family is way later, I would say after you have dated exclusively close to a year. This is how in average it has been for me.
Never too soon. I’ve got out with my friends on a first date with someone else; it went fine because my friends were the band and the place was large enough to move around and chat alone.
That’s not a normal situation, but whenever seems to make logical sense. I don’t usually go out of my way to make it happen and it really is a nothing step.
I’ve never once considered how well they would fit into my social life. The point is how me and her match.
Its simple really, I dont have friends and I dont date. Problem solved.
i met several of my boyfriend’s friends and he met my best friend on our 5th date. we had slept together by then and established a baseline that we were compatible and really liked each other, so it was definitely a bit of a test to see how we got on with each other’s social circles. i would say definitely before defining the relationship, but long enough in that you see it progressing to a relationship. i used to bring any odd guy around my friends on the 1st or 2nd date and then it was embarrassing to tell them i was never going to see him again immediately after, lol.
I tend to lean towards never if dating many, but if you all establish yourselves as each others mate and are looking for a lifelong partner I would say sooner. Waiting is weird to me. If you and my friends, family, kids are weird together I am out. Especially around my kids. I would rather not waste 6months or a year then introduce to my kids or best friend and it be a disaster. Casual dating is totally different though of course. I am by no means saying first date though
Covid has majorly whacked out my timeline. I’ve been with him a year next month and he’s only met one of my friends so far at about 5 months official and just met my family a month ago. I met most his friends at around 1-2 months and his mom around the same time.
I think it depends on how quickly you connect with the person. I’ve been dating a guy for two months, we connected very well and very quickly, and he wants me to meet his best friends. Out of curiosity, I asked if he had introduced past girlfriends to them, and it was only one at a special function. My best friend met him over video chat, bit only because we haven’t had time to schedule anything.
I don’t let anyone meet my friends until I’m in a committed relationship and I know they are in it for a long haul. That said, it has been a point of contention among some fuck buddies and dates. However, the cool ones get it, my boyfriend is meeting my friends for an out of town get together in a month and I’m super excited and so are they because of how picky I am at introducing them to people. My friends are like my family and I absolutely will not introduce them to someone unless I truly feel that the other person is going to be a mainstay in my life
I usually wait until I have friends
How many dates have you been on?
If you are really into someone and love hanging out with them there is no too soon unless your friends are jackasses. In that case, you may need more bonding time.