How do I deal with a somewhat secret relationship? (Super long post)

I’m (20M) in my first ever relationship with my bf (22M), we’ve been together for 6 months now. I feel a bit shitty sometimes because I’m 100% serious about our relationship. I’ve made him an important part of my life and I’m head over heels for this guy lol. He’s wonderful 🙂

He’s met my parents and he comes to mine every weekend (I live alone). We call twice a week so we can feel more connected during the week when we’re not together. I’ve met some of his friends once, and he’s met mine. But it’s hard sometimes because I do kinda feel like a secret because his family is unaware of me.

Obviously we are both men and he is not out to his family (who he lives with) as bi, hence the secrecy. He tells his family he’s going to one city to see his friends, when in reality he’s going in the opposite direction to visit me. Sometimes I just feel like this shameful secret, even when he does give me a lot of love and a lot of his time (I have to acknowledge everything he’s done for me, it wouldn’t be fair otherwise).

I guess I just want to feel like a more important part of his life. I want to be able to go to his room and see what it’s like in person, not just on a screen. I want to meet his dogs that he talks about and sends pictures of. He mentioned his sister has a new boyfriend and it seems like their whole family knows, and I’ll admit I’m a bit jealous.

I obviously have to address the fact that I understand how difficult it is to come out. I’d hate to make him feel pressured into coming out and then regretting it, which is why I’ve not brought it up. I’ve made off-handed comments like “oh I want to meet your dogs” (because I do lol), and he said “you will one day” and stuff like that.

I do want him to take his time with things, so how can I deal with waiting? How can I deal with feeling a bit bad about myself? How can I be more patient?

Any advice will help

TL;DR: I’m in a kind of secret relationship because gay, but I’m struggling