So I’m in a bit of a difficult situation and would appreciate some advice. I’ve been talking and texting with a guy for a while now. He mentioned a few times that we could do something together but he never really asked me out. That went on for like 4 or 6 weeks and since he didn’t ask me out, I asked him. It was a really nice evening and we spent almost three hours after the actual date talking. He leant over to me a few times but nothing else happened. He said repeatedly that we should do that again (and I said I would like that too). A few days ago he was like…we could do…xy sometime. And I was like yeah great idea! But he didn’t really…ask? and kept it more vague.
Would appreciate your advice on how to go on…
No idea who reported this to reddit care, but I’m fine 😀
1 comment
Clearly, he’s not going to take the initiative. Why? Dunno; perhaps he’s not that interested, perhaps he’s shy, perhaps he’s been burned by prior interactions and thinks — mistakenly but sincerely — that this is how a sensitive guy is supposed to act, perhaps he’s a low energy guy, perhaps he’s conflicted. We can’t tell; obviously, neither can you — that’s why you asked us.
So, what to do? That depends, not on him but you. Questions:
1. How much do you like him?
2. How comfortable are you in taking the initiative?
3. Do you have other prospects, and if so, how does he compare to them?
If you really like him, and you’re comfortable taking the initiative, and there’s no better prospect on the horizon, go for it — at least long enough to suss out whether he’s genuinely interested. If not, then not.
If, on the other hand, you’re accustomed to the guy taking the lead, then just let this connection fade naturally and gradually.