Female, 18 my friend is female 17
So my and my friend are friends for 6 years now. We are both 2004 kids but she isnt a legal adult until december. Her mom never liked me too much because 1) i have a punk look 2) i smoke and 3) my mom works abroad which idek how i5s relative. By the way my friends twin brother also smokes and she also smokes so..idk what the issue is.
When i was 16 i got a nose ring and my friend went and got one a year later. Then i did red hair and my friend got red hair 7 months later but it was complete coincidence because i have tattoos (hidden) but my friend never got one.
So today i am at their cafeteria and my friends twin brother gets a beer at 7 pm to drink. as a joke i laugh and tell him thats alcoholic stuff happening. He laughs as well. He leaves and now its 12 am, i help my friend with washing the dishes and i hear her mom yelling my name. I go and ask what happened.
She tells me
“Did you call my son an alcoholic”
I freezw because that does sound like something id say but i dont really remember it.
“Yeah i probably did.” I tell her
She looks at me dead in th3 eyes in front of her entire friend group and says
“I dont wanna hear you saying shit like that about my kid ever again.”
I apologize and go and cry in the bathroom quietly for about 20 mins. Ive tried to be my best selt around her even when she was very cold. I always ask to help with the cafeteria, always offer to get her food if im getting something and always greet when im passing by.
My friend hugged me when she saw me crying and told me that its not my fault and she just never liked me since day one nd that she doesnt give a fuck about her moms opinion..what should i do.
11 comments
Maybe she is blaming you for all the things she doesn’t like about her own children
As a mom, I’d give a fuck ton of bonus points if my kids friend came to me and humbly asked what could be done to better *our* relationship. Tell her the daughter is your best friend, your ride or die, and since you’re friends with the brother too you want to have a pleasant or at least amicable relationship with their mom as well. You could even use the fact that your mom is working elsewhere to your advantage. Tell her you miss having a mom close to you and it would mean a lot if you can ease the tension between the two of you. Be pleasant, courteous, respectful, an most importantly be sincere.
So what
Why should it bother you, what is hate? Can you go to the fridge and get some? It’s just a stupid concept that doesn’t exist until you create it.
Smoking is bad and nasty. You should only smoke weed.
Nothing.
Her mom decided she doesn’t like you. Even if you ditched your punk rock look, quit smoking, got rid of your piercings and tattoos, and were quieter and made no jokes- she would still not like you. Honestly I would do nothing, seeking her approval is pointless. Your friend did the right thing by comforting you and continuing the friendship. I would have liked for her to have a word with her mother about all this and stand up for you. But I know at 17 it is not easy to stand up to your parents when they get angry. However its all been said and done.
I would just not spend time around the mom. Go elsewhere to hang out with your friend.
Own yourself. There’s a lot to unpack there, but simplify it as much as you can before you handle it. I’m a black-sheep, and you’re young. Don’t let people stress you out before you realize you’re trying not to die everyday. Life is hella short. It seems long when you’re young but that sand is dripping right now. Just live. Be happy.
Hey kiddo, leave the cigarettes while you still can..
honestly, she sounds rly rude for no reason. sometimes, ppl just dont like you. ik it’s hard, but dont let her get to your head/bully you around. im not saying to confront her, but maybe dont go to your friends house if her mom is gonna be like that, yk? just keep doing you and try to find a new hangout spot with your friend. youll have less contact w her mom and she wont be able to keep disrespecting you.
Ew this lady is weird. I’d avoid her and avoid trying to be so nice to her. You’re not going to change her opinion of you, and it’s really not your job to. You’ll only make yourself look like a doormat. You are fine. What you said was fine. It was a joke. She’s just a humorless bitch.
Hate her back.