Some context: I (29M) have a non-exclusive fwb (27F) for some months now. We have what I call a “Keep It Stupid and Sexy” relationship: we vibe really really well in the sheets but outside that our interactions have been relatively brief as it is what we both want.
Last week she has invited me to spend some days in her beach house. I communicated my mixed feelings: I’ve never spend this much time with a fwb (usually it is only sleepovers) nor with her. I was also afraid she was catching feelings, which she adamantly denied, because I do not want to break this girls heart. On the other hand, I may be just overthinking some simple since this falls out of my comfort zone.
6 comments
There’s a whole episode of Seinfeld dedicated to this
OK, so ask her why she wants to do this and what the expectations are. She might not have “Caught feelings” (So quaint), but surely she has some feelings here beyond fuck.
I personally like to go away with someone I have some other connections with, sooner or later you have to get out of bed, you know, and then what?
Tell her if you will be “using the back door a lot at the beach house” . Set the expectations before going.
Are you *friends* with benefits or “friends” with *benefits*?
It’s a slight but important distinction.
Go
If “your interactions outside the sheets” have been brief, that’s not exactly a “friends with benefits” kind of deal to me. I guess we kind of lack a word for something like “recurring one-night-stand”.
And yes, I have. Pretty normal to spend whole weekends together, go to events/festivals together, etc. Because – they are friends, and that’s what friends also do.