4-5 months in so far. We are high school seniors that are currently on spring break so we both traveled to opposite sides of the country to visit prospective colleges, effectively making this 1-week period a trial of sorts for potential long distance in the future.
I told her that I wouldn’t be able to FaceTime much but that I’d be available to text almost every day. I initially notice that she doesn’t seem to text that much and only does when I text her first, for the most part. Even though I want her to text more, I understand that being on vacation especially with a specific purpose it must be hard to find time to text people.
However, I find that she had texted her sister and other friends. On top of that her texts to me didn’t seem super conversation inviting even after I explicitly told her I missed her and made it obvious when I replied to her messages within 5 minutes. It hurt me a little bit and made me wonder. I am an only child so no siblings, but still have good friends. Is it wrong of me to think I should be more important to her and for her to give me more attention/time? I’d hate to be controlling and I know I overthink to a great extent but sometimes I feel like I am under thinking and my deeper feelings that she is annoyed/frustrated with me are correct. Any help?
She is still an amazing girlfriend because of her compassion and the love she gives me when we are in person.
Tl;dr It feels like my girlfriend gives less importance to me than she should. Am I justified, and if so, help?
2 comments
It’s justified to want more text communication if that’s what satisfies you, but it might just not be her style.
I know you probably don’t want to hear it but I wouldn’t force a long distance relationship. College is for doing new things, meeting new people, and embracing your new life. You’ll be seriously limiting yourself if you are burdened with maintaining a LDR your first year in college, unfortunately…
You’re young, take your time and learn from every relationship you have.
Long distance relationships are hard and I am saying this from experience.
In order for a long distance relationship to work, there has to be 2 people with very specific personalities to work. They have to enjoy texting, video-calling, they have to have some in-home passions(ex: pc games, movies, boards, art) that can be made together from distance(to be able to share time together). Both parteners have to REALLY like each other(both physically and psychologically) to find a long distance relationship worth it.
Also both should be enough financially stable to be able to visit some weeks at least once in a year. And both parteners have be the very mature type of people that want a marriage-like future not just a funny chit-chat relationship(that btw MOST people at your age want).
I am that type of person and our relationship anyway ended after 3 years. He found someone in real life and it’s understandable, it’s so much better to have someone near you.
So be careful what you get into. This is the sad truth. You will go to college, you’ll meet alot people and might find a new love, don’t lock yourself to the past.