My little cousin (6) comes over every other week due to his mom working, he stays in the room next to mine, every few weeks my fiancé and I well, have sex and the day we were gonna have sex on falls on the week my cousin comes over.At night she starts to undress after locking the door, but I stop her and try to explain that I don’t feel comfortable clapping her cheeks while my cousins can hear her moan, she keeps insisting saying he won’t know what is happening and that we could play it off as the tv but I refuse and lay down. She’s still trying to get to to have sex with her as I type this
9 comments
Can you adjust your schedule? Maybe send a meeting invite for another day that works better for both your schedules.
I suppose there needs to be a more serious conversation. Ultimately no means no. She needs to respect your no, but maybe this every other week arrangement is not working for her.
What happens when you have children? You will never have sex again until the child is 18 and moves out? Or only when the child is not home?
If the moans are the problem then just gag her if she’s okay with it.
If you’re supposed be looking after the kid then do that. If the kid is someone else’s responsibility then you need to try to get over your hang up; very few kids have celibate parents.
You need to talk to her, of course, but maybe some random ideas will give you some options:
1. When you know you’re going to be having both your cousin and girlfriend over, have sex earlier in the day. Maybe make it a special occasion.
2. Sleep on a different floor, if possible.
3. Sleep at her place, if possible.
4. Don’t have sex, but still do something intimate, like a massage, or reading to each other, playing a game together, etc. Make a reoccurring date night/routine out of it.
5. Tent? Not sure if you’re the type of people to camp, but you could sleep in your yard or go to a campground and have a sweet little date.
If you’re not interested in having sex with your family so close, that’s your right to have that boundary. Maybe this can prompt a preferences and boundaries conversation with your girlfriend and you can get to know each other better.
Turn on the TV or music.
My first reaction was that you’re absolutely right, but then I had a second thought.
When you have your first kid are you going to stop having sex until they move out? There’s going to be sex while a kid is in the house at some point in the future. Does that need to be right now? Maybe, maybe not.
You should at least think hard about what you actually know about his nighttime habits. If it turns out not much, you need to start paying attention harder, because you eventually need a sense of when they kids are actually going to stay asleep and when they’re gonna ask for water.
Your fiancee comes over every few weeks. Naturally she wants to have sex and to cancel sex is a big disappointment. Find ways to mitigate the sound like being quieter, abstaining from acts which make a lot of noise, having the TV on or doing it past his bedtime. A blanket ban is not necessary. It’s not as if she comes over everyday.
Loud music or tv / cover her mouth to muffle moans… there are ways around it , or have sex more than just that day lol its an unusual arrangement.