im so scared for my future. i haven’t been in a relationship in year and a half. i’ve been on dates but nothing has stuck. at first i was being “picky” for my own sake, i was in a really toxic relationship and i never wanted to be in that situation again so at the slightest sign of trouble i drop everything now and close my self off. for half a year i was fine. i felt like it was good to be on my own for a bit and i’d date when i’m ready but now i feel like i’m not good enough to for anyone. i know that comes from self esteem issues but i’m working on that but it also come from the people i surround myself with like friends and family. i have so many amazing people around me that are happily in relationships and married but there’s also other amazing ppl that are not in relationships because there lives just didn’t work out that way. and i am insanely worried that i’m headed in that direction and it scares me that i don’t know how to fix it other then settling for a situation i won’t be happy in. i know most of the people in my life that are single are happily single but ever since i was a child i dreamt of getting married and having kids and starting my own family one day and i just feel like i’m running out of time with my life and i don’t know how to slow down and focus on now. i’ve been off dating apps for 3 months but that hasn’t helped so i redownloaded them but i can never feel a connection. i just want to meet ppl and connect now. i wasn’t to be able to enjoy dating again
sorry for the rant i just needed to get this off my chest somehow
1 comment
Sadly I know the feeling. I think for a lot of people we’re in a very unique time. I’m coming up on 2 years. We were engaged and happy, then Covid hit. I think the uncertainty and fear combined with lock down really strained a lot of couples. In my own experiences I spent a lot of time just living through the movie groundhog’s day. I spent the first year just working sleeping and existing. Recently I’ve started working out, reading and actually being open with my friends and family about how I’d been feeling. In my case, thankfully, they were open and helpful. As much as I want to find that special woman and have the married life I think that I need to be in the right head/heart space before I start adding people back in to the picture. For me, No sense rushing to the end of the story if you don’t enjoy the journey. I hope you find what you’re looking for and keep your head up along the way.