What do I do about my partner’s pet?

18 comments

1. You either move in and suck it up or wait for the dog to die. It would be unfair to try to make him rehome the animal and there’s legit no other options.

2. I would just explain what you said here. Make sure you’re honest about hating dogs and not wanting to live with a dog, ever, if that is the case. Because dog people are basically always going to want a dog.

3. Don’t move in with him and his dogs. Don’t have the expectation that he will choose you over his dogs. They are family whether you like it or not Healthy dogs don’t usually smell bad, and if they do it could be an underlying health issu e that will need to be checked by a vet.

4. I don’t know. I love all pets. I have a cat and my most recent love has two snakes and two dogs

5. He needs to kick you to the curb. The dog is obviously more loyal

6. You can’t have it both ways. You need to decide.

7. Don’t move in together until the dog dies. Does your bf know dogs in the home are a deal-breaker for you? Because if not, he could get another dog.

   If he wants to have a dog, and you can’t stand them, you’re just not going through the compatible. That’s fine, that’s what dating (and even living together) is partly for – finding out if you’re compatible.

8. Why are you two planning to move in together when you are incompatible for living together? You bring this up by telling him you have realized you two should not live together, and explain how you really can’t be happy living with a dog. Depending on how much of a dog person he is, and whether your relationship lasts, he might be okay not getting another dog after this one dies, but you two probably won’t get to live together for many years. A lot depends on the age and health of the dog. Also, whatever you do, do not act happy when the dog dies if you two are still together. And give him time and space before bringing up the issue of living together.

9. There’s no guarantee that if he lost this dog , he wouldn’t just get another dog.

   There’s also no guarantee that he would.

   So it comes down to you need to ask your boyfriend about it and tell him you don’t want to live with his dog and you don’t want to live with any other dog in the future either.

   Usually there should be a way that both people can compromise but in this case it really looks like you are going to stand your ground, and he’s the one who has to adjust to it, so if that doesn’t work out, then that’s the end of the relationship.

10. I went through the same situation. Talk to him about it. See if there are boundaries you can agree upon (I.e. no dog on the bed, dog is put away when you two eat). Wash it regularly and find a dog shampoo that neutralizes the odor as much as possible. Also, if you remain emotionally distant with the dog it won’t bond with you and it’ll pretty much just leave you alone at home. Make sure your bf agrees to be the primary one taking care of it; it’s easy to build resentment if the dog is always following you around expecting you to feed/water/play/walk it. It’s not going to be amazing, but if you’re ready to move in with him it’s worth the compromise (as long as your bf agrees to boundaries)

11. Break up because you’re not compatible.

12. Just like every sentient being I wish dogs happiness and health and sincerely hope they’re being treated well by the people in their lives. And I really really hate when people hurt animals. But I just do.not.want.dogs.around.me.ever.

    I don’t know how I’d bring it up, sorry, I don’t have advice. Except… hm… maybe I would just have to say I do not and will not live in a house with dogs. And then stick to it. And then he gets the choice to decide whether he wants to live with you or not

    People really do break up over this stuff because a lot of people really do see dogs as family. So it makes sense that you’d both have to be on the same page

13. You need to tell him that you don’t like dogs and that you can’t live with dogs and that it is non-negotiable. This is an okay boundary to have! However, it is likely that this is also going to be the end of the relationship. Dog lovers really love their dogs, and it would be really sad for him to not have a dog or for him to see you sharing the house with a dog but ignoring it.

    You are not compatible for living together.

14. “Absolutely disgusted with dogs”, damn. I think he’s better off without you! Kidding, but not really.

15. >I just hate dogs, I hate everything that has to do with them, I think they are stinky and I don’t like their behavior, I just don’t like simple.

    I mean… then don’t date someone who loves them and wants one.

16. Tell him clearly because he needs to know that staying with you means giving up dogs for the rest of his life- it’s likely he will want another dog once this one passes. Dog people stay dog people.

17. Tell him that you don’t want to live with a dog and don’t want to move in until after the dog has passed and only if he isn’t getting another. If he wants more dogs in the future that’s an incompatibility as others have said.

18. You need to be clear with him about this, because if he’s a dog person he’ll want other dogs in the future.