What is something that your partner did that you can’t forgive them for doing?

6 comments

1. Years of telling me he would do the dishes or clean up later and then months passing and him not doing it, took 5 years to realise he would never change 😭

2. my last one gave me a five minute phone call for comfort when i desperately needed him. my grandma, boss and a dear customer died within one week and i was crying my heart out.

   he was partying with friends. he gave me the timespan it took to smoke one cigarette, then headed back in to continue drinking.

3. He cheated on me many, many times and it eventually led to the end of our relationship.

   But the thing that hurt me most that I was never able to fully forgive… when I was pregnant with our second child, he accused me of being pregnant with someone else’s child (I had not slept with anyone else so this was just totally out of left field) and he barely looked at me for the entire pregnancy. He wouldn’t touch me even to hold my hand. Didn’t show any affection at all. Wouldn’t hold our baby after he was born. Left me at the hospital by myself.

   During my pregnancy it was like I couldn’t fully process my hurt but after my baby was born I was beyond hurt and also angry. My husband always maintained that there was no reason for him to apologize since he genuinely thought it wasn’t his baby. Anyways. I’m totally detached from him now, no feelings whatsoever but that whole experience still stings when I think about it.

4. They are former partners now.

   In no particular order:

   Lied to our friend group that I was having an affair with my best friend. I wasn’t.

   Told my kids that he didn’t care if he never saw [us] again if it meant he could be free.

   Trapped me in a sexless marriage, saying his health was too frail for intimacy. After 8 years, I discover he was shtupping the upstairs neighbor.

   There are more incidents, but these are the primary upsets.

5. [removed]

6. He used my own insecurities and things I confided to him against me. I told him things I never told anyone before and opened up thinking he would understand. It was such a betrayal in trust, and it impacted me more than I realized at the time.