So my last post got removed because it was originally classified as a rant, but now I want to pose an actual question, what would make a guy ghost someone who he’s been texting and asking to meet with all week?
I’ve had a guy message me multiple times saying good morning messages or voice texts, saying how attractive I was and trying to meet a couple times previously in the week but my schedule was busy and his requests were kinda last minute. So I told him I could do the weekend, come weekend. We finally have a day set (Saturday) I message and ask him where/when he wants to meet up, and he goes complete ghost, doesn’t open my message.
But I know he didn’t die or lose his phone because this dude still has been viewing my IG stories! Just straight up ignore my message and not even offering an explanation.
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None of us can ever know. He never wanted to meet, he just wanted attention, he lost interest/someone else captured his interest, he felt depressed or anxious, he felt sick, he had a work deadline, he stopped dating, he got married, he got engaged, he had to pick up his kids. This is the norm with online dating. Save yourself some time and energy and not attempt to figure out why people do what they do especially when you don’t know them so can’t really even logically attempt to rationalize the behavior.
He’s immature, selfish or a significant event occurred.
Same thing happened to me recently so I feel ya.
Last minute requests are never a good sign and flaking last minute is just rude and disrespectful. No need to try to understand his behavior, just move on and keep doing you.
Getting ghosted really really sucks. And it fucking hurts too. It makes you feel like a worthless piece of shit. Sorry, I’m projecting š . It made ME feel like a piece of shit. Hopefully you didn’t take it as hard as I did. But if you did, stop it right now. You did nothing wrong. They forever reason left things like that. Any ghosters can step in here…what’s one reason why? Like someone else said, there are literally countless reasons .
A few Possibilities….
1 he was super thirsty and just trying to get laid and now he’s not
2 he has emotional issues and got but hurt
3 he’s in a relationship and thinks his girl is suspicious
But you will never know, Online dating is about Being careful not to get cut as you search through a hay pile of a full of Razor blades to find your needle.
I don’t know why people do this. Within the past month, a guy ghosted me after we set up a time to do an in-app phone call and another ghosted me when trying to set up details for a coffee date after we confirmed the time.
I’m starting to wonder if people have gotten addicted to swiping. It takes low mental effort and is easier to keep swiping, thinking someone “hotter” is just one more swipe away, instead of taking the physical and emotional effort to build a rapport with someone and actually meet them IRL.
From a guy it’s just wishy washy behavior. It’s nothing you did. And it’s no one you are missing out on.
He either got scared or he was super horny and realized you aren’t going to have sex with him right then and there.
What a scumbag. He could have easily lied and said he was sick, and given you the chance to make new plans for your Saturday night!
My guess is he has a girlfriend (who he isn’t that into), got a “better” offer (ie a slutty girl he’s already hooked up with so knows he’ll deffo score) or just got cold feet (he lied a bit about his weight/height etc).
He’ll text you with a lame excuse in a few days/weeks. If you’re a total sucker like me you will probably give him a second chance and then be disappointed all over again š
This has happened to me, arranged a date and then on the day of date he disappears off my matches and he blocked me on Facebook lol, I just put it down to he couldnāt really be bothered meeting me and it was easier to just ghost. I was quite relieved in a way because I couldnāt really be bothered meeting them the place was a bit far out and would of taken a lot of effort for both of us (ie trains etc )
Never have a ‘meet day’. If there isn’t a day, location, and time set, there is no date.
Thanks guy very valid reasons and definitely reminds me that in dating, most of the time you never know why tf anyone does anything and alot of times it has nothing to do with you. I blocked him, after waiting a day to see if he would reach out with an explanation (none).
Just sucks cuz I was actually getting excited or hopeful to meet him. Dating is such an energy sink, and getting past the first one seems like half the battle.
I have also had this happen. That is why I limit texting/talking prior to a meet. I do not have the emotional bandwidth. Also had many men ask for a date, I agreed, never heard from them again. I am actually happy when they remove themselves, next!
I had a guy āghostā me after we had a 2 hr phone call the night before, planned an entire date with location, food pickup and activities, texting all week and really enthused to get to know each other. Day of the meetup he was āunavailableā MIA the whole day.
Finally hit me up that evening and said he āoversleptā and that it wasnāt a big deal. It really annoyed me and I blocked him. We had literally talked hours before the day of the date (supposed to be a picnic) so it was weird to me.
People online tbh are kind of rude and donāt value strangers feelings or time because thereās sorta no incentive this day in age.
I feel like Iāve heard guys mostly say āI realize I have feelings for (anther girl I met online/an ex/someone else irl) and they get cold feet like 10 mins before š
I wish theyād sort that shit out before planning to meet women
If they don’t lock down details before all of this they usually don’t plan to actually go on a date. People agree to a random day, but not the place or time, because they’re deciding whether or not they actually are excited to see you. The few day buffer usually is enough time for people to find someone they’re more excited about.
The best thing I think you can do is remind yourself to not care what the reason why is. Focus on what they did and whether or not that works for you.