I (25F) am don’t think I will ever find a man that wants or can dominate me, not due of lack of trying. I am a 179cm tall (yes I know, very tall), a normal weight,and a quiet outgoing woman that most often dresses alternative or goth. So I am none of the things that typicaly make up submissive women (not in media at least or what I’ve heard from other men that they want in a submissive women), I am neither small, petite nor shy.
Every man I’ve interacted with till now has percieved me as agressive and dominant. Every man till now that has ever been interested in me has wanted me because he thougth i could dominate him. I would try to do so and not really enjoy myself. I do enjoy normal sex however I would like to explore my sexuallity more, it feels as thought people will only ever percieve me as a dominatrix. There are even man that immidietely start of their flirting with me by calling me “mommy” or they’d slip into the conversation later how they want to get dominated by me.
I really don’t understand what makes people say this , I feel as thougth I just act like a human being whose behavior doesn’t dictate or suggest how they want to be treated during sex. Furthermore, whenever a guy comments on how he can imagine me dominating another woman or chocking him,it makes me want to cry. :’) I just wanted to get this off my chest, does anyone feel in a similar fashion?
7 comments
Try looking for a primal dom. There are specific D-ttpe architects for your specific desire
I kinda feel this, but in reverse. I’m a man that wants to be submissive. But it’s so against the average that the man be the submissive one that it’s hard to ever get to fully experience. I’m also a bigger than average dude. I’m not like 6′ 5″, but I’m kinda tall. So that probably doesn’t help. So over the years, I’ve just sort of learned to be the more dominate one and get over it for the most part.
Sure you will
Start by stating clearly what you’re ideal role would be. I’m about the same height, not petite or shy, and dominating man without fear are out there. I no longer mess around, I tell from the beginning what’s going on, I’m not in the mood for a million things to go wrong when I can easily reduce it to half a million things.
Assert what you want, I’ve cared for 4 subs, 2 were your typical 5’3″ bigger girls who wanted both sub and nothing else. One was my height 6’3″, and wanted more of a slave relationship. The other on was 5’10” and ended bad, each one though I had to coax what they wanted, so be upfront and be honest. The type of guy you’re looking for is out there. And just a suggestion, try finding a place where people who are into the BDSM culture congregate, but for the love of all, please be with some trusted friends.
Hold onto your dreams… it’ll happen eventually. I’m 6’8″ and heavily built. Happily married now, but I did one spend several months dating a very submissive 6’2″ girl who really appreciated my size etc.
Don’t give up hope.
Try getting out in your local kink communities, go to some munches and meet real people outside the expectations of dating.
People of all ages, shapes, sizes, and looks engage in all different types of kink roles. Don’t let media and porn make you think that there is just one type.
Identify as a sub, don’t leave room for people to think you are interested in domming by saying you’ll try it. Just be clear about your leanings. You are super young, you have lots of time.