We’re now almost 2 years in a relationship, my girlfriend and i had a conversation about how she doesn’t want a guy to kiss or touch her when the guy already touch or kissed someone, she asked me and i lied to her that she was my first, and now my guilt is eating me up and i want to tell her but I don’t want to lose her, i genuinely love this woman. Please tell me what to do?
8 comments
You don’t
I personally wouldn’t want to be with a woman with this kind of hang up. Unless you guys met in high school, it’s a very unreal expectation and standard to have. I’d hate to see what other kind of unreal expectations she’ll try to hold you to.
I’d be flat out honest with her that she’s not your first, and see what her reaction is. If she loves you, she’ll get over it. However, if she ends things, you need to respect her insane wishes.
For future reference, don’t build a relationship on the foundation of a lie.
That being said, so much time has passed that she knows you by now. The best thing to do is some clean and accept the blame. Hopefully she has whatever idea out of her head that made her think she needs a virgin
There’s big chance you’ll lose her if you tell her … don’t tell her .
Simple you don’t tell her
At this point there are 2 options. Don’t tell her is one bc chances of her actually finding that out is slim to none. Second option is to be honest which is the best option. If she loves you she will stay. It’s kinda messed up to expect that you haven’t ever touched another female at all.
If you want to screw everything up go ahead. If you decide to lie to her, you become a liar. She will think everything you say is a lie and question everything you do. Now. Are you ever going to cheat on this woman? Do you treat her like a queen? If the answer to the first question is no and the second one is yes, take this with you to the grave. The past is the past, it is just that. It doesn’t matter. I had the same issue with my girlfriend. I talked to a priest about it and everything. If she doesn’t need to know and all of this was long before her, leave it how it is.
Everyone has a past, however this was a big deal for her and you should have been honest! With that being said, your relationship was built on a lie and when you confront her, she may have a difficult time trusting you again