I’ve (26m) been messaging this girl (24f) for a few days on Bumble. She seemed sweet, although she wasn’t very responsive. She mentioned that she was very busy, since she works two jobs and an internship, too. Plus, school will be starting back up soon, so then she will be even busier. It sounds like she could be making up a lot of excuses, but to me, it seems she’s telling the truth, so for now I’m inclined to believe her.
After a couple of days of messaging, she went radio silent. So I assumed she lost interest. But out of the blue, she mentioned she was at this barcade, and her friends had left, and asked if I wanted to meet her there. This was at midnight on a Sunday. I’m trying to be more adventurous, so I said yes.
We had fun playing games and talking. And I expressed that I wanted to see her again, but she seemed hesitant. She brought up all the things she has going on in her life that would take up her time. So she said she would be very busy (Which is understandable). But she didn’t seem disappointed at all that she would have trouble setting up another date. She was just like “Yeah I’m gonna be busy…” and I’m pretty sure she’s telling the truth, but it seemed like she was *really* saying “I’m not gonna see you again anymore, dude. Deal with it.”
I also hugged her before we both left and she seemed not happy about it. I jus felt it would have been odd to leave a date without a hug or a kiss.
I think I might have left a bad impression. Or maybe she was just inviting me out of boredom, and had no intention of seeing me again, anyway. Either way, it’s quite demoralizing. I hate getting my hopes up.
Edit: she said she had fun, but she won’t give me a straight answer as to whether or not she wants to see me again. I’m just going to leave her alone. I don’t want to come across as creepy or clingy.
Edit 2: now she says she’ll make time for me… I don’t know it sounds like she’s just trying to avoid hurting my feelings. I’m not really sure what to say.
3 comments
People make time for the things and people they want to do. Sounds like excuses to me. Move on.
There are only two different possibilities when you encounter something like this:
1. She’s making up excuses because she’s not interested in you and is waiting for you to get the hint. **Your action**: take the hint and unmatch her. This is what I would personally do in this situation.
2. She is interested in you, but truly is very busy. **Your action**: decide if you could date someone who barely has time to ever see you or communicate with you. Sounds awfully boring to me IMO.
If she is too busy to date, then why is she on bumble. Sounds like she is trying to reject you but doesn’t have the spine to be direct.