My girlfriend has had issues surrounding her past to where we have sex once maybe every 4 months. It’s gotten to the point where we both watch porn each day and just handle it ourselves. We have considered being with other partners sexually/swinging, switching it up etc… We are not sure where to go and how to go about fixing it. I love her but I feel stuck in a sexless relationship.
5 comments
If nothing seems to work & you both have fallen out of attraction for each other, go separate ways.
Wait she’s considering having sex with someone else instead of you? Red flag right there. I can understand past issues causing someone to not want sex or lower sex drive, but to say they’d be fine getting it somewhere else doesn’t really make much sense to me.
If she has past sexual trauma, I really don’t think swinging is going to help that. She needs to get into therapy. I frequently give advice in r/deadbedrooms and never have I heard of swinging helping a relationship. More often than not, it will end them.
Let me put your situation into “maths”.
Horny girlfriend + horny boyfriend = individual masturbation
Wow, that’s a dreadful situation to be in. Both of you want it yet you can’t make anything of it. Yeah, that sucks and I feel seriously sorry for you to be in a place like this at that early stage of your life.
My SO and I haven’t had sex in many years. However, she *never* masturbates or does anything sexual whatsoever. If she did I’d be incredibly pissed and probably on my way out.
For you, it’s probably best to move on. You’re just too young at age 24 to struggle with what usually comes upon people in their 30s and 40s.
At 24, why are you dealing with this nonsense and still with her. You’re acting like a married man who’s trapped in a relationship because divorce will financially ruin him. Drop her and enjoy life. She’s either not that into you or needs professional help from past trauma. Neither of which benefits you. Sounds like an unfair situation: she gets resources, security and protection…you get…nothing. RUN!! Live life. Let the married guys cry about a horrible sex life