My girlfriend is amazing. No doubt about that. She loves me and we’ve been in a relationship for almost a year now and it has been nothing but perfect. We initially took it slow – I was seeing her for almost 2 whole years before we decided to call what we had a “relationship”. What I’m tryna say is that relationship means a lot to the both of us. I don’t like to waste my time or anyone else’s when it comes to committing to someone.
Personally, I don’t do relationships so it is a huge deal for me to get into one. And I am in love with her however, there is something that keeps bothering me.
She has this habit (at least she had) of checking men out even when I’m around. I’ve caught her in the act a couple of times. It’s not really a big deal for me because I know she’s never going to act on it but I had found that disrespectful to do when your partner is around. I let her know how I had felt and she took it well and let her perspective of things be known as well. It was smooth sailing after that.
However, lately I’ve been hanging out with some of my friends who she’d not met. We go out to parties and have get togethers ever so often. From these bunch of guys there is one person who’s recently had a break up from a very long relationship. He’s on his journey of self-improvement and self-discovery which I’ve noticed occurs whenever someone goes through a rough patch. I am happy for my buddy because he deserves it! He’s starting a new venture soon, is in the best shape of his life and I can see how positive he’s become. However, I can’t help but feel that my girl is a little infatuated over him.
She’s laughing a little harder than she usually does when he’s talking about something, (I feel) she’s kinda checking him out ever so slightly and she’s complimenting his physique in a very… different way. Not sexual but as if she is kinda amazed by it or something but doesn’t want to say it out loud.
It bothers me because that’s a good friend of mine right there and that’s my girl who (maybe) likes him. I get the aspect of a confident, focused person being very attractive, of course it is! But then that’s my girl who genuinely loves me which I know for a fact.
I don’t wanna make things awkward so I haven’t spoken about it to her. I think I may appear insecure about myself if I do that which at this point idk if I am. However, I don’t want to give her that impression or come off as a possessive boyfriend. I want to be good man for her because she is a good woman to me. But I’ve been conflicted and it keeps intruding my mind and I fear it may reflect in a different way – may come off as resentment.
I would be happy to listen to any advice that you may have for me. Thank you.
TLDR I feel gf is likes my friend
2 comments
For someone who doesn’t like to waste time when it comes to relationships, you’ve wasted a lot of time not being in one with someone then deciding that what you have is a relationship. Then this person is someone who you don’t fully trust.
Either you two are in a monogamous relationship and trust each other or you drive a wedge into your relationship because you don’t trust your girlfriend, not on what she’s actually done but what you perceive she feels. Sounds like you have a lot of insecurities to work through by yourself then to work with your partner on boundaries that are sustainable for this relationship.
My friend, if she wanted you and only you, she would avoid being around him and not what she did/does…!
She definitely is hitting on him, which means that you placed your bet on a dead horse…
Speak with her and see what she has to say and if you want proofs, ask your guy friend to do a prank on her, like calling her when you are with him and ask for a date, better, an overlapping one with meeting you – see what she will do/say. And if she goes, meet/wait for her instead of the guy!
I am convinced that she will go full in and will lie to you.
Good luck!