My boyfriend and I (F) have been dating for a year now. We are both in our early 20s. Honestly I didn’t have great luck with dating so I felt relieved when he wanted to be my boyfriend. He’s handsome, smart, and we never run out of things to talk about, but to be honest, I’m just not…fulfilled. I love spending time with him and i look forward to seeing him, my heart still skips a beat when he calls me, but I just know deep down that he’s not right for me.
He’s affectionate with me and treats me well, but I can also see him being cold and callous. I want someone more pure and kind hearted. He’s also not at the same stage of life as me yet, which is fine but I just don’t see him wanting the same things as me. Eg I want a relationship that leads to marriage, kids, settling down but he’s definitely not mature enough.
I just really don’t see a future with him but every time I think about breaking up with him I can’t do it. I like spending time with him and I don’t want to lose that sense of companionship and feeling wanted. If I break up with him, I’ll have no one to call me or cuddle me or tell me I’m beautiful or that I’m loved.
And I’m scared of starting over. I’ve been rejected before dating him and I hate the thought of putting myself out there again and being vulnerable. I’m scared of being hurt. I’m scared that I’ll never find anyone better.
Yet at the same time I’m kicking myself for wasting my prime years on someone I don’t see a future with. What if I’m missing out on a better fit because I’m too scared to move on? I’m at an impasse. I don’t know what to do.
TL;DR: I know that my boyfriend isn’t the one but I also can’t leave him
1 comment
You are so young and there are so many other people out there. So, so many. It will be difficult but when you find that right person it will be worth it.
Don’t grab onto the next guy that wants to be your boyfriend. Shop around. Make sure you find someone you REALLY want to build a life with.
Don’t settle. Do what you need to make yourself happy. You only have one life.