Help! Do online relationships work at all? (Male 18) and (Non binary 18)
tl;dr: My partner (nonbinary 18) is afraid/unsure to commit to a relationship with me (male 18)
They love me alot as I love them
Being an online relationship is an issue
Hey reddit, I recently found a person who is really special to me.
I really like them with all my heart and I want to be there for them as much as they like to be there for me.
I will save the details but this is a month old relationship and its online. We have grown very close quickly and we really like each other.
Funny thing: We broke up.however we both do have feelings for one another.
We broke up because we feel like we aren’t ready to commit just yet. We are both on great terms and chat almost every day and just chill and live life basically.
We are both scared of relationships due to what has happened to us… we both came from horrible relationships in the past (we are victims of abusive partners)
and we really want to give in effort.
I know they love me and I love them.
My SO feels like online relationships never work and I complied and basically we ended off as a “lets see what happens next”
I retain myself from being lovey dovey I am extremely affectionate and now Im trying to give space for them to breathe and process things. they are not flirty most of the time I am the flirt but they always initiate something “more” and so romantic . They flirt so.. so good to the point we get a little ..closer… but the next day they pull away.
This is like hedgehogs we love eachother but if we get too close we might get hurt.
They are unsure about relationships.
Now we are just chilling and waiting whats next for us. I am willing in doing my best to respect their boundaries and I need reassurance on what should I do?
3 comments
would it just be an online relationship? will you ever get to see them irl?
If being in an online relationship is an issue, then they shouldn’t be in an online relationship. It really is that simple.
Honestly, stay friends and don’t make any plans to be romantically involved. Distance the friendship, as well. Consciously cut down on romantic interactions and personal small talk.
My “one month love” relationship as a teenager ended with him being abusive and the whole thing was really, REALLY weird. I wouldn’t recommend long term planning like marriage or children or living together.
You probably aren’t at the financial or maturity level to actively live together, so thinking about it only opens up a daydream avenue. When it’s actually about to happen you’ll be Much more likely to get cold feet.
If you decide you want to be romantically involved, long distance would be better than solely online.
Traveling to meet up, having watch party dates, etc. Try your best to have an in-person relationship, except it’s online.
There are a lot of resources for short or long term far distance relationships.
But I recommend cutting down the romance before it swings in, and start thinking about other, truly in-person romantic relationships.