What dumb experience have you had on a dating app?

14 comments

  3. I had some women on Plenty of fish send me a message saying “Hey”… looked at her profile and decided she wasn’t my type. So I never replied back and thought because women tend to get loads of messages a day by men. She wouldn’t care…. and then minutes later she sent me a following message saying “It’s because I’m a big girl isn’t it. You men are all the same”… I then rolled my eyes and ghosted that as well. Only to her to play the race card and accuse me of being racist because she happened to be black and went on a massive rant… I ended up blocking her and not saying one thing to her the entire time.

    I have no dating preferences based on race as I’m happy to date any race and I’m a bit chubby myself so no issue dating “big girls”.. I just decided she wasn’t my type. Nothing really offensive

    I also remember having a woman on tinder like me and their bio said “I think all men are bad people. Be the one to prove me wrong”…. how about no and YIKES!!. You’re suppose to advertise yourself in your bio and that was her idea of an advertisement… that’s like me applying for a job and in the application description saying “I think all employers are bad people. Hire me to prove you’re not” 🤦

  4. Some woman I met on hinge told me “I’m not looking for anything serious”

    I’m like: okay, that’s fine with me. Would you like to go and grab drinks this Saturday?

    Her: yeah but can you pick me up? Mind you She lives 40 minutes away

    Me: Oh, well, I’d like you get to know you first. I don’t pick women up unless they’re coming home with me after or we already established there’s romantic interest between the both of us. If you’re comfortable with doing that then let me know, we could work something out .

    Her: I’m not the one to sleep around, I don’t know where you’re getting that.

    Me: ok, have a nice day

  5. Swiped on a girl whose profile said she was looking for matches for her friend. I figured the profile would be pictures of the advertised friend, but apparently it was the matchmaker. Probably not the best way to market a product.

  6. Not too long ago, I met a girl, who we’ll call Kate, on Tinder. She gave me her snap, which led to me getting her number. We called for a few hours, a lot of dirty talk. Me likey. So we make plans for the following day..

    I pick her up next evening around 8:30. Bring her back to my apartment and we go to my room. I play a song, we start making out.. she kinda has bad breath but it wasn’t too bad and I’m a slut, so we kept kissing..

    Here’s where it gets dumb on so many levels. She starts rubbing me and asks; want me to suck you off? I say yeah, and she says okay, just turn off the lights and put on a movie. I turn my TV on and Kubrick 2001: A Space Odyssey was at the credits, i’d finished it a few hours ago. So I restarted it, and the famous bombastic orchestral music is playing while she gets going.. with a toothy ass blowjob. Painfully so. So painful, I say hey, let me just eat you instead…

    So I get to it, while the fanfare still blares, and man she has a rank pussy…. like god damn, son! I don’t mean pheromonal, either, just BO. So I grew tired of it quickly and hopped up to get going in missionary. It was alright, but she had a really nice ass so I asked her to turn over…

    Shit. There was shit all over her asscrack.. I see it in its full hideousness as the orchestra sing from the TV.. I stifle a gag and she says “I know what you’re gonna do.. just take it slow” insinuating that we were to do *anal* together…. I shuddered, but I didn’t want to tell her. I’d hate to embarrass a date like that who was a good person to me. So I just ask if we can kiss instead, she says sure…

    I’m thinking of an out in my head when my friend just incidentally calls me to ask if I wanna play some BO1 zombies.. I tell him you’re a lifesaver and come back in the room to tell her we gotta go, my mom is gonna be back soon (she doesn’t even live with me lol), and I take her back home. Blocked her, and had to wash all of my sheets and my comforter…

    And all this happened to the fanfare of Kubrick’s Space odyssey… So dumb.

  7. I hooked up with 30+ girls off of tinder, bumble, and the league before I met my current SO (IRL). I met my ex of 3 years on tinder and my ex of 4 months on the league. Lot of crazy experiences but pretty much all positive except for the ex who hurt me.

  9. To be fair, I put it all completely on myself. I more-or-less knew what I was getting into, and I could have avoided it; however, I intentionally just wanted to see what would happen. Anybody with common sense would’ve steered FAR AWAY from the whole situation, but I played along.

    Skinny black girl working at hooters who *obviously* wasn’t on dating apps for sincere reasons matches me – INSTANTLY starts sweet talking me “hey hun, how you doing boo 😘.” I cringe just thinking about it, but whatever. Turns out she’s at some hotel for some god forsaken reason, and she wants me to pick her up.

    I can’t remember if she asked for a dinner date, but regardless, I absolutely wasn’t going to waste money on her. I was just like “bruh I’ll just get you home, how far is it?” and she told me “just a few minutes down the road babe.” I get to the hotel, and it turns out she had a friend with her – a very large girl at that. Whatever though, I’m just taking them home.

    Looking at her friend, I could tell she was extremely scared and nervous. Either I’m way more imposing that I thought, or this girl had/has just went through some shit. Didn’t say much the entire ride.

    # WHICH BY THE WAY TURNED OUT WAS ACTUALLY FUCKING 40 MINUTES OUT OF THE WAY.

    At the 30 minute mark, I was very tempted to just throw them out onto the street because fuck that shit, but obviously I couldn’t do that in case her friend was actually innocent and just trying to get home. I’d rather not turn out to be the bad guy in the story when I intentionally chose to take responsibility.

    Finally got them out of my fucking car, and a few minutes later, the bitch STILL had the audacity to message me one last message “hey sweetie can I have $50 to pay for phone bill? 🥺”

    Fuck that whore. I do still wonder what became of that friend though and if she’s okay now

  10. I met a girl who was cute based off of her profile pics on tinder. When I met her in person she was an estimated 40-50lbs heavier than her posted pictures also the left side of her body from the shoulders down was alot smaller. I forget what she had exactly but her left side was slightly paralyzed or something so the muscles were atrophied and her left arm and hand where alot smaller than her right and she walked with a limp. I ended up still taking her out cause I didnt want to show up and just floor it the hell outta there as soon as I saw her standing outside my car waiting to get picked up. After the date i didnt see her again. She was really nice but it got kinda weird first off cause of the whole not mentioning anything about her condition but at the same time I would do light banter during some of our convos at the beginning and she slowly got more comfortable throughout the date and she threw in some of her own light banter and it was funny but it kept progressing more and more through the day and that banter turned into straight up talking shit and she was the only one laughing almost hysterically on her own. I could clearly tell she didnt date much and couldnt really pick up on social cues, especially the uncomfortable ones I was for damn sure giving off after awhile.

    Anyway after the date I got back home and immediatley went to her profile again to make sure i didnt miss her mentioning her condition or anything. Nope,no mention of it anywhere on her profile, her photos were clearly old photos and I noticed that they were all taken of her right side in different angles. There was not a single photo that exposed her left side or anything to give even a slight hint at all about her condition.

    I wouldnt be surprised if another dude ended up in the same situation as me and pulled up to pick her up or agreed to meet her somewhere and ended up surprised. I fully understand why she would do it but at the same time like, you should definetly give someone a heads up…

  11. TLDR: someone tried to pay me money to find them a partner. Someone would not date me because of my zodiac/star sign.

    someone said that they wanted to date me and that I was perfect except they won’t date me because I have a tattoo. I was like OK cool whatever.

    A couple of weeks later they DMed again saying that they’ll make an exception for me. I said nah it’s cool. thanks.

    so a couple of more weeks go by and they DM me a third time. they said they will pay me to find someone exactly like me who does not have tattoos. I emailed them back asking them why they were soliciting me to be their fucking pimp.

    I blocked them shortly after.

    another time someone DM to me after they read my profile and said Something along the lines of “ we’re perfect for each other I read everything you wrote but you’re a Sagittarius“ and it was really confusing for them because they were told that our sunsigns don’t fucking match or some shit.

    I said OK thanks and left it at that. They emailed me a few days or maybe weeks or some shit later saying that they can’t understand why I could possibly be a Sagittarius when we get along so well (keep in mind we’ve never been on a date. All they did was read my OKC account) and they said they’ll make an exception for me Even though it’s really out of character for them .

    I was polite and declined the offer.

  12. Matching quickly with the girl I’d just broken up with. And we were each other’s top match.

  13. Just this past Tuesday, I got shot down after we initially had a date planned for tomorrow afternoon. I was chatting with this 34 year old, who claimed to be a kinesiology professor. We were making small talk about bedroom scents. I told her that I like lavender and citrus scents because they’ve helped repel bed bugs/dust mites from my room, along with me changing my sheets more regularly. In one reply from her, she said “OK this conversation has gotten a bit weird with scents and bed bugs. I’m out, but I wish you good luck in your search.” She apparently took it the wrong way, thinking that I’m dirty and that I still have that problem.

    This was a teachable moment for me to be more careful about what I say, especially via text. Also, it was a reminder that there are some funny-acting women on these apps. She rushed to judgment and didn’t bother to get further clarification about what I said.

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like